Someone you trusted so much, you loved so much, you cared for so much, hurt you. They hurt you so badly it felt like a knife piercing into your stomach and ripping out your heart. Maybe it’s been days, months, even years, and sometimes the pain still stings. Every time you think of the incident, what they said, what they did, it stings even more. You feel it down deep in your stomach. Your throat feels swollen. Your knees are shaking. Your whole body full of anger because you’re that upset. You feel bitter. That’s resentment.

You can’t get away from it, yet you can help it. Are you still holding a grudge? I have had my fair share of broken hearts, not just from some stupid boys either, but from even good friends, and other people I cared deeply about. They were people I thought I could trust and in reality they ended up disappointing me in the end. It’s a part of life. Some of them don’t deserve to play a big part in my life anymore. There are even some of them that are still in my life because that’s just how it works, we have to be around each other. People change though. These situations have happened in the past and I have no doubt in my mind that they will happen in the future. Sometimes people don’t even apologize and sometimes they don’t even realize what they have done to be forgiven …

Forgiveness is actually a really difficult process. Especially when you don’t feel like the person that should be forgiven deserve your forgiveness. The first step of forgiveness is to understand what forgiveness really is. It’s a decision to let go of resentment, thoughts of revenge, and even beginning to come to the place of reaching an understanding and compassion. In other words, get over it and live your life.

Forgiveness doesn’t justify or excuse what the person did. Humans make mistakes and they should be forgiven. Don’t you make mistakes? Don’t you want to be forgiven? However just because they deserve the right to be forgiven doesn’t mean it should be forgotten because forgiveness isn’t forgetting. Actually, it’s important to remember it, so then you can avoid the hurt in the future as much as you possibly can. That doesn’t mean you have to go back to everything being peachy keen.

I just think clinging to that disappointment is bad for you. Time can heal wounds if you allow it to. You should forgive because if you’re so strung up on holding grudges, you may become so wrapped up in past wrongs that you can’t enjoy the present. If you don’t let go of wounds from the past you may carry them over to future relationships that you pursue. What good would that do for you?

Honestly life is full of disappointment, just like it’s full of satisfaction. The bad makes the good look and feel even better. People will disappoint you. Yes, people you love, and it will hurt really, really, really badly. Sometimes it’s expected and sometimes it comes from nowhere. We all have our own battles.

People have accidents, make mistakes, behave selfishly, and even sometimes we intentionally try to hurt one another. We can't escape it. Forgiveness is a vulnerable act and it can even feel like you’re opening yourself up to more pain. We all have our own way of processing hurt. The first step to getting over something is forgiving. As easy as it sounds and as hard as it is to do, just … Let. It. Go. If you don’t let go of the effects of the injury you could risk serious emotional consequences for yourself in your future.

In the end sometimes the only person that ends up hurting is the one that hasn’t done the forgiving. In life, we tend to receive what we give. None of us are perfect. The more we forgive others for past, present, and future mistakes, the more others will forgive us when we make mistakes. Forgive and you will be forgiven. When was the last time you truly, deeply forgave someone? It can be someone in your past or present, or it can even be you.

Matthew 6:14-15

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”