The other day I was enjoying a glass of soda after a long week, and a girl scoffed at me.
"You drink soda? That's not healthy," she said.
Now I am 21, reasonably fit, and I have no major health issues. Especially none that would be evident to someone who had just met me.
But even if I did look sickly, that still gives her no right to criticize what I eat and drink.
This is far from the first time this has happened, and it probably won't be the last either.
Sometimes it's gotten to the point where I skipped a meal because I couldn't deal with people pestering me about my food choices.
These are not children making these snide comments. These are adults, my age and older.
Mature adults do not judge other people for doing things that do not affect them.
Mature adults worry about their own lives and their own health and don't push their standards onto others who have different bodies and different needs.
The last time I saw this kind of judgmental behavior was in eighth grade, and it wasn't acceptable then. Why should it be acceptable now?
I know people who can eat an entire large pizza by themselves and not gain an ounce, and I know people who gain several pounds after one night of indulgence. Everybody is different and the same diet will not work for two people with different metabolism and nutrient needs.
If someone has social anxiety, food shaming can make them afraid to eat in public, which can lead to them skipping meals or avoiding much needed positive social interaction.
If someone is trying to improve their health, unsolicited "advice" from strangers can make them feel even more insecure about themselves and lead to them giving up or even going too far and having an eating disorder.
Judging others' eating habits does not make you look cool or knowledgeable or "concerned for someone's health." It makes you look judgmental and shallow.
If you're really concerned about someone's health, you don't make their mental health worse by pointing out their flaws, and you don't give advice if you don't know their situation.
And if you've been affected by food shaming, remember that what those people say reveals a lot about their own insecurities.
We spend countless hours of our lives eating. You can either spend those countless hours being anxious about strangers' judgment, or you can spend them eating food that makes you feel good and allows you to be your best self.
Sometimes that means enjoying a soda, or a hamburger, or a bowl of ice cream.
In moderation of course. Though what that means to you will be very different than what it means to the person at the table next to you.
(By the way, you think my soda is disgusting? I think your hummus is disgusting. But I'm not the boss of you, so you can eat what you want.)
