There has been many a day where I have been seen surrounded by my "brothers" and been asked which one I am dating. The answer? None of them. These boys are like family, they are some of my best friends: older, wiser, married men that have been strong Christian examples in my life for the past two years. But, as I've started college, I've realized any amount of kindness or investment I put into other people's lives is taken as bold flirting when it is around boys. Why? Is it because I smile big and greet every boy with a brave, "How's your day going" and a huge hug? Is it because my eyes light up when I see a friend—who happens to be a boy—walk into the room?

I believe it is all of the above and more. Within the ministry world, there are easily ten men for every woman in the room. In the live production world, the number of men to every woman is even larger. I am in both worlds at the same time. For almost nine years now, I've served on my massive church's student ministry live production team, helping run lights, audio, and video every Sunday. For years, all of my friends were men, which is understandable. They were who I spent all of my time around. They have taught me so much about how to live life and the kind of man I want to marry someday. They became the pseudo brothers I never knew I needed or wanted. But people would ask which one I was dating. They are all married. I am dating absolutely zero of my pseudo-siblings. You want to know a secret?

That's okay!

We live in a world where kindness is considered flirting and investing in someone is considered pursuing. And dating? Forget it. You're practically married by that point! I was raised by a good, southern momma who taught me to be kind, love others, and be genuinely interested when you ask questions. If I remember the birthdays, college majors, and favorite coffee orders of my girlfriends, no big deal. If I remember all of these things about a guy? Suddenly I am meant to be in love with him.

When I ask questions, I am genuinely curious. I want to know what it was like growing up the way you did. I want to know what the last ~20 years of your story happens to be. I want to know what makes you laugh and cry. I want to ask you how your sports game went, even if no one else remembers it happened, because I truly hope it went well. If I ask how your test goes, it is because when I looked at my phone and saw the time was 2:17pm and, knowing your test was at 2:25, I said a little prayer for you in that moment. These are the things I would do for any girl I am friends with, because I care. These are the things I would do for any boy I am friends with, because I care. These are the things I would do for anyone I know, because I care.

Let people care about one another instead of telling them they should be doing the exact opposite. My friend Jonathan has always thanked me for supporting him in all his dreams and ambitions, but why would I do anything else? I'm proud to call him my friend, no strings attached. I'm lucky to have the opportunity to care about him, no strings attached.

I'm not going to apologize for caring about people, and I'm certainly not going to apologize for wanting to invest in people's lives, even if those people happen to be boys. Instead, I want to encourage any of you who are in close friendships with the someone of the opposite sex: it's okay. This world needs more platonic relationships. If we would see a pretty girl talking to a cute boy as a human talking to another human instead of a potential relationship that everyone and their mother has an opinion on, maybe the world would be slightly less worried about what everyone thought and more curious about what other people are thinking.