Did it happen just like you always dreamed it would? The first day of freshman year, you looked up and locked eyes with a beautiful human you had never seen before across the cafeteria, then as the music swells in the background, you meet and as the story books say, the rest was history! Happily ever after forever and ever!

Probably not.

But whether your first real "serious" relationship lasted six months or three years, ended in a strong friendship or created a bitter new enemy, you can’t say you didn’t learn a lot about relationships and most likely, a whole lot about yourself. PSA: I'm going to go ahead and say that no, your 8th grade relationship that lasted for three weeks where y'all only communicated over text doesn't count. Please stop talking about your 8th grade romances like they're an actual thing, they're not, cut it out.

Your first relationship, however great or horrible it was, was the time you found out that relationships weren't just for your parents, your best friend or Kristen Bell & Dax Shepard (everyone's favorite celebrity couple), they're for you too. And with everything you do for the first time ever, you learn as you go. For example, the first time you rode a bike did you skip the training wheels and pop a wheelie right away? Of course not! You fell, a lot. But, you got back up again and again until you got it right. No one is perfect right off the bat, especially when it comes to dealing with another person on a daily basis. Looking back, you might smile or grimace, but I know you are (or should be) grateful for that time because at the end of the day, you learned something. The lessons you learn in your first relationship might be the most important, because they will influence how you approach every other relationship in the future. I know you at least learned how to deal with disappointment and some form of heartbreak (unless you’re one of those unicorn couples who decided that they’ve had one killer relationship and are just gonna stay together forever -- in that case, screw you for being annoyingly perfect).

So what did I learn for example?

I learned I should never be trusted to give directions and that yes, I am in fact late to everything! I really suck at winning arguments and when I'm comfortable around someone, I never seem to shut up (even when they desperately want me to!)

Little things to show you care about someone go a long way and you should always go out of your way to celebrate the accomplishments of people in your life, but celebrate how your bf/gf would want to celebrate. Not everyone loves fireworks every time they get an A on a test. If your S.O. isn't at every soccer match or baseball game, don't sweat it, but if they willingly miss the big stuff in your life, they're not putting you as a priority, and that's not okay.

Honesty is the most valuable asset in making a relationship work, and having some one who can always make you laugh is sexier than any six-pack. Insecurities don't just disappear over night because you get a bf/gf, and loving yourself is a necessity to loving someone else.

Being vulnerable is probably one of the most terrifying things in the entire world, but the clarity you receive from it is unmatchable. Ditching your friends for a new found love is never okay, your friends are the ones who always have your back and will always be there for you, don't take them for granted. (Besides, who else is going to listen to you vent for 30 minutes about your boyfriend's latest dumb move or help you decode his horrible texting skills?)

You shouldn't put up with people who don't appreciate you and who don't love you for exactly who you are, and you should never say something you don't mean--whether negative or positive, you can never take it back.

Now obviously some of these "lessons" are more important than others, but you get the picture. So even if your first love affair ended in tears and screaming “liar” at Titanic, think back, how many lessons did you learn? I realize the person might suck and you might question why you ever subjected yourself to the torture of dating them in the first place, but as they say, everything happens for a reason. Maybe whatever happened in your first relationship was meant to happen so that in your second...or third...or fourth, you don't repeat the same mistakes or put up with the same things that led to the end of your first.

So hey, at least mentally thank your first for making the rest that much better!

Or at least for improving your make-out skills.