What It's Like Dating A Bouncer
Swoon

Not Only Did The Intimidating Bouncer Let Me Into My College Bar, He Let Me Into His Heart

But now he's just a 6' Costco teddy bear that can make a killer dinner.

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Not Only Did The Intimidating Bouncer Let Me Into My College Bar, He Let Me Into His Heart

Let me just tell you, the night we met, the last thing I was expecting was to meet someone who would eventually buy a plane ticket to come to visit me, states away. Normally girls my age are scared of the big guy working the front. But for some reason, he was not scary—he was more welcoming if anything.

I had just woken up from a four hour, midday, nap and was DREADING the sound of my alarm clock telling me it was time to put on '80s aspen themed clothing. Kid-you-not, I ran out the door with barely any makeup on, wet hair, and one shot of Svedka for a fraternity date party. Definitely wouldn't say I was looking to meet someone, especially a 290-pound bouncer (250 at the time, he'd get mad if I didn't clarify that he was "skinny" back then).

Believe it or not, I was eyeing him for a while. I was trying to figure him out. He did not look like a typical bouncer, he seemed innocent and sweet. He also looked very uninterested and bored, so I wanted to lighten up his mood. I could tell he was young, only a little older than me. The all-black outfit made him appear very fit and young. I had to know more.

I approached him by saying "Hey are you on Tinder because I think I swiped left?" (Definitely not your go-to girl for pick-up lines.) I had just made a Tinder for experimental purposes and had not to clue which way was "hot" and which way was "not," so I just had to take an educated guess.

Luckily rather than him kicking me out of the event, he thought it was funny and said: "I did too."

Thanks for not completely blowing me off after that one. I guess the pickup line did the magic because you asked for my number.

Texting you was so natural and normal. I felt like I could share my entire life with you and you would listen. It was almost scary how comfortable I felt. Our conversations flowed beautifully for about a week and then you decided to make the bold move and ask me on a date.

I have never been so nervous for a date in my life. My stomach was in knots the whole time leading up to dinner. I was biting my thumbs trying not to text you canceling. And my friends didn't make it much better.

"Are you seriously going on a date with the bouncer!"

"How old is he, 40?"

I talked on the phone to my roommate the whole walk to the restaurant until I saw him waiting outside to greet me. He was intimidating for sure, mainly because of his size, but also the fact I was literally going out with someone who could potentially get me arrested.

It wasn't until we were ordering and you ordered a wrap that I realized I was really into you. Because what big boy orders a wrap for dinner besides one that's nervous on a first date? Just as our texting went, our conversations at dinner never died, and it was never awkwardly silent... at least as far as I can remember.

After that night we already had plans for a second date and the rest was history.

The hardest part about being "the girl the bouncer is dating" is getting texts every Thursday night from people I'm barely friends saying, "Hey can your boyfriend let us into the bar?"

It was the worst when I was all the way in New Jersey, missing him, while people back at school were constantly using me to get to him. I even once had a friend of mine tell me she wanted to "take him home." Or always feeling obligated to go out nights he's working just to see him for five minutes. So it definitely isn't easy at times but that never scared me away or stopped me from pursuing him.

To me, he is so much more than the bouncer at the bar.

You are a five-star cook, world's deadliest driver and you "have the motor of a skinny little guy on the field." You have a special superpower that instantly makes me smile when I'm crying or laugh when I'm angry. Among all your talents my favorite is that you can embarrass me under absolutely ANY circumstance. That, my love, is impressive.

We get through exam packed weeks, long work shifts, and average meals because we know we will have one another to look forward to at the end. We push each other to be the best we can be and we always encourage each other to do the absolute most.

I look up to you (literally!) and will forever be grateful for meeting you when least expected because I have gained not only a role model but my best friend.

While dating a bouncer can get frustrating, it's what brought me to him and for that, I am so thankful.

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