When I was younger, I was insecure about a number of things, my body being one of them. I was a preteen at the time, growing up and starting to develop my adult features. While my body went through several changes, my mind state changed as well. At this time in my life, I hadn't fully grasped the concept of accepting how I was and trying to make myself better in healthy ways. I was engulfed in the "typical" preteen/teenage girl mindset of not loving myself. I saw that my appearance was very different from what I thought I was expected to look like. My stomach wasn't the flattest, and had some texture to it, my skin had hair, scars, and other blemishes, and my mind wasn't in the best state. I ended up dealing with these insecurities in unhealthy ways, to try to correct my perceived flaws.
Looking back on it, I can only shake my head and regret how dense and naive I was being. I let media and societal pressures get to me, and in turn ended up hating myself for a good portion of middle school. I wasn't happy, to say the least, and it wasn't until around my freshman year of high school that I finally cleared my head and realized what I was doing to myself. Torturing myself with toxic thoughts, purposely eating less than I normally did, and for what? So what if my stomach was a bit chubbier than someone else's? Why should I change my wardrobe to hide patches and flaws scattered across my skin? Why should I strive to be something I'm not when it means throwing away my happiness?
Thankfully I got back on track with my mindset. I talked to some people about what was going on in my head, I worked towards becoming a better me rather than being a mannequin in the window shop of society. Although I haven't overcome all my insecurities, I've learned to accept who I am. I've abandoned thoughts of self-hatred and neglect and have started down the road to self-love.
We all have things that make us feel insecure. They can be anything, like how you eat an apple, how you laugh, how your natural hair looks. Other times, they can be more extreme, and can take a toll on the way you carry yourself. I know it can be hard to overcome them. Hell, it might take years to get past them. But I promise you, with patience, time, understanding, and acceptance, they can become a silly little thing of the past. Take it from someone who knows the aches, pains, and general discomfort that comes with insecurities. They can keep you from eating, playing, dancing, singing, swimming, laughing, and doing what you want to do.
You don't have to face your anxieties and doubts yourself. Talk to a trusted friend, relative, and try your best to stay positive. Find others who understand what you're feeling. Decorate your mirror with uplifting notes, and don't be afraid to take a chance. Where you see a flaw, someone else will see unique beauty.
