When you graduate high school everyone talks about how your life starts to change.

The summer after graduation is filled with grad parties and late nights hanging out by the fire talking about what college will be like. Then when it finally comes time to move-in, everything happens so fast. One day you're arguing with your parents about cleaning your room, the next you're living on your own and you haven't talked to your parents in over a week.

The transition is different for everyone. Some people naturally excel in the collegiate environment, others need time to find their footing. But what they don't tell you is that you're eventually going to have to deal with transitioning back home too.

Keeping in touch with everyone from home isn't easy. It takes constant effort and planning. Even if you talk to your friends every day or even every week, your dynamics will change. Once you're away at school for just a few months you come back a different person.

Therefore, logically, your relationships have to change. This isn't to say that you and your best friends won't find yourselves back in someone's living room, sitting in your usual spots and talking like you never left, but most of your friendships will change in some way.

You'll start to see people drifting apart. This isn't always because of a falling out, sometimes life just gets busy and you can't possibly make time for everyone. People prioritize their strongest relationships and go from there. There's nothing wrong with this process, the human brain is only capable of maintaining so many relationships at one time, and your new college friends now occupy the spaces previously held by the people you sat next to in a few classes, or even the people you thought you would still be friends with ten years later.

I had heard about this process from a few people, mostly older family members. I disregarded what they said because I figured in a world of technology and social media, it would be impossible for me to not stay connected with everyone.

What I didn't understand at that time is there is a massive difference between keeping a Snapchat streak and maintaining a friendship. Long-distance friendship requires much more than sending daily Snapchats, liking and commenting on Instagram, or even liking pictures from a formal on Facebook.

When we rely on these things we miss out on the truth. I want to know how my friends have changed and what type of people they are becoming. I want to know what classes made them realize they were passionate about something or that they were reading a book written hundreds of years ago but somehow it was completely relevant to their situation.

I also want to hear about the times all you want to do is go home. I want to talk about how much it sucks when you're sick and your mom isn't there to take care of you. I want to hear about the mistakes and regrets. The problem with a social media dependent friendship is that you miss out on all of this. You only get the polished version of events.

When we allow friendships to turn into this, instead of calling or FaceTiming, we don't prepare ourselves for that transition home. I've found that the friends I fall right back into place with are the ones I've actually talked to. I've heard about that week that sucked and that mental breakdown that followed, which means I also know how they grew from it. Knowing the genuine details means I still know them, even if they aren't the same as when we left.

What I was the least prepared for was dealing with the negative changes. Like everyone else, I had friendships that I assumed would carry on until we all ended up in a nursing home together, causing trouble like always.

Unfortunately, change happens, and sometimes you realize it's too little too late. This was a new reality I had never faced. I was used to high school where you have a summer off and maybe you don't see each other for a few weeks, but then school starts and you see each other every day and things go right back to normal. This isn't the case with all friendships. For whatever reason, it just isn't the same. That level of comfort is gone, and all you can do is hold on to what's left.

No one wants to admit this is happening, but if you acknowledge it and face it head on, you can put the required effort in and keep as many of your relationships as strong as possible. One of the most important things to keep in mind is that if things don't work out the way you want them to, it's okay. It's okay to be sad or upset over this strange feeling of loss, but don't let it hold you back from moving forward and making new and lasting friendships.