Women are praised for their resilience and elegance every waking moment, but could over-appreciation subdue us? I’m talking about rape. I know the word hits you in the chest like a brick, knocking the wind out of your body, but it's pop culture’s ugliest secret. We can talk openly and make jokes about sex, but why is it so hard to understand that ,after all the joking and conversation, no still means no.
Amber Rose, model, actress, and feminist, explained how it doesn’t matter what situation you’re in that “no means no” on an episode of “It’s not you, its men” co – hosted by Tyrese Gibson and Rev. Run. “Dress as you would like to address.” Rev. Run responded suggesting that the way Amber Rose dresses give off a certain reputation. While Tyrese cosigned saying, "I'm just saying, the comfortability some people find in wanting to touch or grope you. It's an energy that is sent out there that creates that type of response."
Well, I applaud you, Amber Rose because you are absolutely right! Women should have the consent to go through any sexual contact no matter what she is wearing. This matter is popularly called “Slut Shaming.”
Slut shaming is the act of criticizing a woman for her real or presumed sexual activity, or for behaving in ways that someone thinks are associated with her real or presumed sexual activity. The most popular form of slut shaming is specific clothing that a woman might wear. If a woman wants to feel sexy, or wants to be sexually open minded, a male should not take those signs as a “yes”, even if she’s screaming “no!”
If she is sexually active and she say no to your booty call, she has that right! If she’s is drunk and you are trying to have sex with her and she screams no, that is rape because she did not give her consent. If she wears the most provocative clothes, flirts with you, and you force her to have sex with you, that is considered rape. No matter the situation, she wasn’t asking for it.
I know rape is a sensitive conversation to have, but it’s the most uncover epidemic and its killing our strong women.Rape can make our women experience depression, self-harm, Post Traumatic Syndrome, Spiritual complications, and plenty more. Ladies, Rape is NOT your fault. If you are engaged in kissing or petting, you are NOT obligated to engage in sexual intercourse. A man SHOULD NOT have sex to prove his masculinity. And when you say “no” to sex, they should understand that you mean “no”, so men should NOT ignore your refusals.
Once again, I give my kudos to Amber Rose for standing up for those who get slut shamed every day, and for those who may even get sexually assaulted from Slut Shaming. Along with her interviews and parodies, such as a Funny or Die video that made fun of the “walk of shame,” a phrase used to describe people who’ve had a one-night stand, she hosted her very own “Slut Walk” to raise awareness to Slut Shaming. Also at her event, she elaborated on how she was first slut shamed when she was only 14 years old, and how she forgave those who said crude and harmful things about her.
In other words Ladies, don’t let anyone stop your hustle. You have one life, it’s yours, and you get to do whatever you please with it.
Slut Shaming = Bad
Living your life by doing whatever makes you happy = Good
Everyone minding their business while you continue being fabulous = Priceless.
You are not alone, if you need help: call 911. If you need advice or counseling, reach out to the nearest HOTLINE, or even me. Here's a hotline : Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.
