We all have those friends that we've known forever. Those friends you met in preschool or kindergarten and have been with you throughout your whole life. You grew up together, making countless memories along the way. As sad as it is, those people can change sometimes. They become someone you don't recognize; it can be hard to accept, but sometimes you grow apart. They can meet new people, and spend all of their time with them. Friends should never make you feel left out or left behind. It can be very difficult to admit to yourself that you need to let go of fading friendships and focus on the solid ones. Sometimes you just need a little push.
Ask yourself, are you the only one putting in effort? Do you text that friend/friends to hang out, or even just to catch up, and get no reply? Do you find yourself letting it slide, giving them the benefit of the doubt? Maybe they're busy, you try and reassure yourself. It works, until you see them post a Snapchat story, or an Instagram post. If it's a common theme, let them go. Once you stop putting in effort, you see who your true friends are: those who reach out.
Do you trust them? Trust is the foundation of every relationship, would you tell them your secrets? If you have to worry that they are going to turn around and repeat what you say to someone else, let them go. What good is a friendship where you don't feel comfortable enough to confide in the person?
When do you talk to them? Do they only reach out when they need something? Do they ask how you are? Do they text you saying they miss you? Or do they text you asking for a favor? Don't be willing to drop everything you are doing for someone who wouldn't do the same for you.
Are they flaky? Do you see Instagram pictures of them out with friends, when they didn't invite you? Do your plans (plans that you probably organized) with them always fall apart? Do you feel like you've given them too many chances? "OK, no problem. We can go next week!" you text them. Next week rolls around and they don't text you. Sound familiar? Let them go.
If you found yourself saying yes to more than one of these questions, maybe it's time to move on from the friendship. You deserve better than fair-weather friends. Focus on the people in your life who you trust with everything; focus on the ones who text you first. Focus on the ones who you see often, the ones who you laugh the hardest with. It's okay to have a small circle of close, valuable friendships, as opposed to a large group of inconsistent ones.
