1. The creepy guy.
Equipped with a solid grey T-shirt circa 1987 and an unforgettably creepy stare, you never really see him working out. Instead, he spends his time walking back and forth between the cardio equipment and the weight machines, taking obnoxiously loud drinks from the water fountain. He takes this time to stare at the women working out, making everyone feel uncomfortable. To all the creepy gym goers out there, find a new tactic. We all know what you're doing, and your leg hair is unbearable.
2. The apparent "ninja in training."
There seems to be a ninja in training at each gym that I have been to. Comfortable in his own corner of the gym, he strictly wears sweatpants and a baggy T-shirt with the triforce of courage printed on the front.
3. The meathead.
The meathead is typically seen as a male, but females can be just as much of a meathead as men. They always get their daily workout in, but it takes them 3-4 hours due to the fact that the majority of their time is spent staring at themselves in the mirror. You can find them at the free-weights with a stockpile of various weights around them. I would like to say that I appreciate the dedication of the meatheads, but I could do without their horrible screaming. We all know that you are ridiculously strong. Loosen up that heavy lifting belt a few notches and tone down the grunting, please.
4. The "once in a while" gym goer.
You can find this person wandering around, trying to find the piece of equipment that they actually know how to use. However, when they do find something they are comfortable with, they spend a maximum time of three minutes actually lifting, and about 10-15 minutes on their phone. They also are not in any sort of routine, as they do eight reps of almost every machine available.
5. Someone that was clearly dragged there by a friend.
Similar to the once in a while gym goer, this person is lost but you can clearly tell that they do not want to be there. They spend most of their time accompanying their friend, pretending to be a spotter but in reality, they don't know what else to be doing. They are also on their phone, but they are not surfing the web. They are bombarding their friend with texts such as, "How long do you think bro?"
6. The super old guy.
At first glance, you feel bad for this guy because he is too old to be there. He's struggling, his arms are quivering, he's wearing jeans. But most importantly, he is trying his hardest and he is the friendliest person there. Don't confuse him with the creepy guy. However, the two sometimes coincide.
7. The frat boy.
Wearing an old philanthropy shirt that has been transformed into a cutoff so small that it shouldn't even be considered clothing, he switches between working out and adjusting his backwards snapback, so that his hair looks good popping out of the back.
8. The guy who acts like he owns the gym.
Wearing nothing but gym sponsored clothing, he walks around judging everyone else there with his trusty shaker in hand. He talks to the personal trainers as if they have been life long best friends. He is also typically the guy who interrupts your workout by talking your ear off. I don't care that you make your own protein, and I appreciate the offer, but I'll just stick to what I'm doing already.
