It’s a beautiful New York City summer night and I'm chilling with friends, laughing and eating dumplings we had gotten from the bodega down the street. I get a notification that my best friend has tagged me in a photo. We had gone to a fun party the night before and I assumed it would be a picture from that. I was excited to see it.
I open my Instagram to see the pic and my first thought was,
"WOW. I look amazing in this photo!!"
Because I had been photoshopped.
My best friend had edited the photo. He had thinned my right arm, added lipstick and made my skin more tan. The problem was not that we looked poppin’ – the problem was that when I looked at the picture, it didn’t look like me. It wasn’t me. As the comments started rolling in with words like, “So hot” and the fire emoji, I was getting more and more upset.
A short disclaimer. Do I love filters? Yes. Do I edit the brightness and saturation on my pictures? Sometimes. Do I feel like editing the fly aways for a magazine cover is okay but editing out a pimple isn’t? Yes, and I don’t know why…
Here’s the thing. I get it. We’re in an age where you can thin your waist, arms, and thighs. You can make your teeth look like the after shot of a Crest commercial and your skin like a Maybelline ad. And you may be saying to yourself, why wouldn't I edit myself? Or why wouldn't I make myself look amazing!? Well, I can think of a couple reasons.
- (The first reason is selfish and petty, but real.) I would never want someone to see me in person & think that I'm prettier on Instagram, thinner on Facebook or an altogether different person online.
- More importantly, though, we are putting way too much pressure on ourselves and on others. How are you affecting your younger sister as she watches you thin your waist? What kind of pressures are you then putting to younger generations? At what age will they start doing the same kind of body manipulating?
- Lastly, I would like to celebrate who I am. I was made unique. You were made unique. No two people in the world are alike. Isn't it amazing?
There is a huge pressure right now to have tons of followers online and to look nothing less than flawless in your photos. But you know what else is happening in the world right now?
A celebration of…
Being creative, being yourself, working hard, and following your dreams...
All things you can do with a normal sized arm.
Although a picture can speak a thousand words, it cannot begin to express all that you are capable of. A picture is a snapshot. A moment. So let that moment be what it is. Whatever it is. Whether it be fabulous, flawed or fierce (or a little bit of all three.)
And to my best friend, you’re incredible. We see this issue differently and that’s okay! But next time, please leave my arm like it is – pale and normal-sized.
