12 Do’s And Dont’s Of Being A Girl

12 Do’s And Dont’s Of Being A Girl

It's more simple than you think.
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Being a girl is a tricky spot to be in. Regardless of your background, your choice of style, what you look like, where you live, all girls suffer the same injustices of being female and reap the benefits of the same. Thus without further ado I present to you a list of 12 Do’s and Dont’s of being a girl:

1. Do: be kind to everyone

It’s so simple, yet so many fail to do so. Kindness goes a long way. There is never any true, valid reason to treat someone without kindness. I don’t care what someone said to you or did to your friend, there is no point in stooping to another’s level. Rise above.

2. Don’t: let people to call you names or put you down when you stand up and voice your opinion as the strong woman you are

If I had a nickel for everytime I was called a bitch, or aggressive, or bossy, for telling people to treat me with respect, I’d be rich. The rap women get for sticking up for themselves is a negative one, and for men it’s a virtue. Such a double standard will only continue if us girls don’t demand the respect we deserve for the opinions we are entitled to. Don’t let anyone, peer or authority, male or female, put you down for calling them on their bullshit.

3. Do: work hard toward your goals

We all have goals, I don’t care if you want to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company or you want to finish reading the Fifty Shades of Gray trilogy—they’re all goals. Work for them. If you want something, it’s not going to fall into your lap, you have to put in the time and effort to achieve what you want.

4. Don’t: let the fear of disapproval or rejection keep you from what you want

This ties into #3–desires (especially in the form of goals) are scary, ominous beings in the distance that you often have no idea how to reach. Even in the 21st century, there are countless barriers in place for women, making the fear of disapproval or rejection even more relevant. But, you’ll never know unless you try.

5. Do: love your body and soul as they are

This is a big one, and my number one “Do.” Everyone, especially us girls, is so hard on themselves. We’ve all heard it so many times, and I’ll say it again: self-criticism is the harshest form of criticism and by far the most toxic. Your body is your body, treat it with respect, love it for how it is, and take care of it. You are your soul; what is there not to love? The only person you have to deal with your whole life through is yourself, so you better learn how to get along.

6. Don’t: deny your body and mind what it requires for nourishment

This one goes with #5. Why would you deny your body the food and nourishment it needs to stay healthy? Why would you prohibit your mind the love it needs to flourish? I know it’s easier said than done— I’ve been there, a story for another time. Just remember when you decide to cut those 500 calories, that you’re harming yourself in so many more ways than one. There is nothing more beautiful than someone with a healthy mind and body.

7. Do: take time for yourself

We all get so caught up in our everyday doings, it’s hard to take time for oneself. Between school or a career, hobbies, friends, family, all that there is to do in a day, remembering you need time devoted to no one other than yourself is key. Set aside a good chunk of time to do whatever it is that makes you you, whatever makes you happy. You’ll thank yourself later.

8. Don’t: be found guilty of girl on girl hate

It breaks my heart to see a huge portion of hate coming from one girl to another. We are all part of the bond that is being a woman. Treat your fellow ladies with respect: don’t slut shame each other, talk shit, be a bitch, steal someone’s man, be rude, etc. Like in #1 there is never any point to be unkind, I don’t care what your reason is, just don’t do it.

9. Do: be proactive

Similar to #3, work hard, but more importantly, don’t cause yourself more pain by being lazy and waiting around. Get it girl! As they say: “Get up. Dress up. Show up. And never give up."

10. Don’t: base your self worth on comparisons to others

You are you. You are not her. You aren’t the same as any other being on the planet so how can you compare yourself to what you are not? Compare yourself to where you want to see your abilities in the future. Be the best version of yourself.

11. Do: educate yourself

I don’t mean you have to go to a top 50 university. Hell, you don’t have to go to university for all I care. The definition of educate is: “give intellectual, moral, and social instruction to (someone).” Everyone has the ability to be intellectual, and you can be intellectual in whatever you so choose.

12. Don’t: worry yourself sick about the future

There is no point in worrying yourself over something you cannot foresee. Live in the moment, and do what you can now to help shape the future you want.

Most, if not all, of these Do’s and Dont’s should be upheld by every person as a human being. Regardless, every woman is entitled to her own life. There is no guidebook on “Being Female,” although sometimes I wish there were. The fact of the matter is, you being you is the best and only version of a girl there is. Be yourself; strive to be better. Don’t fret over “she does this” and “they wear that.” Your self-worth should be based on your self-love, which should be 100%.

Cover Image Credit: Isabelle Roshko

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If You've Ever Been Called Overly-Emotional Or Too Sensitive, This Is For You

Despite what they have told you, it's a gift.
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Emotional: a word used often nowadays to insult someone for their sensitivity towards a multitude of things.

If you cry happy tears, you're emotional. If you express (even if it's in a healthy way) that something is bothering you, you're sensitive. If your hormones are in a funk and you just happen to be sad one day, you're emotional AND sensitive.

Let me tell you something that goes against everything people have probably ever told you. Being emotional and being sensitive are very, very good things. It's a gift. Your ability to empathize, sympathize, and sensitize yourself to your own situation and to others' situations is a true gift that many people don't possess, therefore many people do not understand.

Never let someone's negativity toward this gift of yours get you down. We are all guilty of bashing something that is unfamiliar to us: something that is different. But take pride in knowing God granted this special gift to you because He believes you will use it to make a difference someday, somehow.

This gift of yours was meant to be utilized. It would not be a part of you if you were not meant to use it. Because of this gift, you will change someone's life someday. You might be the only person that takes a little extra time to listen to someone's struggle when the rest of the world turns their backs. In a world where a six-figure income is a significant determinant in the career someone pursues, you might be one of the few who decides to donate your time for no income at all. You might be the first friend someone thinks to call when they get good news, simply because they know you will be happy for them. You might be an incredible mother who takes too much time to nurture and raise beautiful children who will one day change the world.

To feel everything with every single part of your being is a truly wonderful thing. You love harder. You smile bigger. You feel more. What a beautiful thing! Could you imagine being the opposite of these things? Insensitive and emotionless?? Both are unhealthy, both aren't nearly as satisfying, and neither will get you anywhere worth going in life.

Imagine how much richer your life is because you love other's so hard. It might mean more heartache, but the reward is always worth the risk. Imagine how much richer your life is because you are overly appreciative of the beauty a simple sunset brings. Imagine how much richer your life is because you can be moved to tears by the lessons of someone else's story.

Embrace every part of who you are and be just that 100%. There will be people who criticize you for the size of your heart. Feel sorry for them. There are people who are dishonest. There are people who are manipulative. There are people who are downright malicious. And the one thing people say to put you down is "you feel too much." Hmm..

Sounds like more of a compliment to me. Just sayin'.

Cover Image Credit: We Heart It

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How To Practice Self-Care In College

Due dates. Finals. Papers. Here's some advice on how to not go completely crazy during these stressful four years.

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Being a senior in college, I know how stressful and demanding school can be. Here are a couple tips on how to stay mentally and physically healthy during these four hectic years of our lives.

Trade your morning coffee for a glass of water. 

Instead of turning on that keurig as soon as you wake up, grab a cold glass of water. I'm telling you, it really jump-starts your morning. Bring a water bottle to class and fill it up throughout the day, too. Obviously, I still drink coffee because I basically can't function without it, but make sure to incorporate a lot of water as well. I've found that I'm more focused and awake the more water that I drink.

Eat breakfast.

I usually start with a bowl of oatmeal filled with whatever you want – blueberries, walnuts, cinnamon, and honey are usually my go-to. It's crucial to eat breakfast because it gives you energy for the rest of the day. You're basically fasting for 8 hours (let's be real, it's probably less than that) through the night, so you're stomach is empty and ready to go as soon as you wake up. If you're tight on time, grab a protein bar. I personally like the Think Thin chocolate mint protein bar, it's plant based and tastes like a dessert, so win-win.

Practice yoga.

I know, people in the world write about how amazing yoga is in their blog, but it's true. I randomly decided to take yoga in college, and it honestly changed my whole outlook on it. It's both mentally and physically rewarding; it keeps you in shape while at the same time helping your mental health. I highly recommend taking a yoga class, or even just looking up some yoga poses on YouTube and practicing at home.

Meditate.

I recently downloaded an app called Simple Habit, and it reminds me every day at a certain time to mediate for 5 minutes. Just taking that small amount of time out of your busy day to clear your head makes such a huge impact on your mental health.

Read more.

Put down that 5,000-page biology book for a few minutes and read something actually enjoyable. Recently, I've been reading To All The Boys I've Loved Before because I'm 13 years old. I think it's important to take some time to read something for entertainment and your own pleasure rather than always reading books for school. Not only does reading improve your cognitive skills and widens your vocab and can help you relax.

Write in a journal. 

I've always had a journal since I was probably in elementary school. Although I don't use my Girl Tech password journal anymore, I still like to write in a journal sometimes just to get my thoughts on paper. It helps me to reflect on my day and make sense of everything. It's kind of like free therapy. Also, I think it would be cool to go back five, ten, even fifty years from now and read my old journals and see how my mind has changed over time.

I can admit that I wasn't the best at self-care when I first started college. It took me a while to figure out how important it is to take care of yourself in order to stay sane and be healthy. It's hard to prioritize our own health especially when we're used to prioritizing school, work and everything else in between. Just making a few small positive changes in your daily routine can make all the difference.

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