If you, like me, find yourself alone in your dorm room for Spring Break, you’re most likely pretty bored right now. Use this comprehensive list to help creatively stave off loneliness.

1. Indiscriminately eat everything in the fridge.

Now is the time to make all the ungodly concoctions your roommates would never approve of. I just ate Dijon mustard on some lunch meat bought with the intention of making a masturbatory toy for a friend. Don’t shame my college experience.

2. Contemplate your life decisions for three hours on the toilet.

Meditation is the key to a happy life and healthy bowels. First plan of action: stop eating lunch meat with Dijon mustard.

3. Edit old photos for Instagram

VSCOcam six weeks worth of future #tbt’s. (Can and should be done in tandem with #2.)

4. Stalk your classmates on Facebook.

Collect conversations starters for after Spring Break. How was Aruba? So sorry your dog died. (Also complete with #2.)

5. Befriend your local pigeons.

Take a walk to a nearby park to get to know your neighbors. They’re highly misunderstood.

6. Befriend another city’s pigeons.

I hear it’s best to travel alone if you want to meet the locals.

7. Erratically commit to a workout plan promising to give you something in less than 30 days.

Define your abs! Lift your butt! OK, can I do this in one day instead?

8. Plan on catching up on homework.

The key to this is not actually doing anything.

9. Make a very personal and unhelpful list to be posted online for your own amusement.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

10. Wave to people on the street outside your window.

Take a shot every time someone waves back for extra Spring Break points.

11. Make a quasi-gourmet meal at 3 a.m.

Aim for something involving roux or mirepoix. The Frencher, the better. Plate appropriately.

12. Shower to a whole album.

I will be trying this tonight. Top picks: “Oops!... I Did It Again” and “Jason Derulo” with bonus tracks. Alternatively, try just replaying “Ridin’ Solo” for an hour. Jason gets it.

Disclaimer: This is bad for the planet. But aren’t we already kind of screwed anyway?

13. Tag your friends in cute dog videos on Facebook.

Give in to the urge to be one of those people.

14. Catch up on all the world news you missed during midterms.

Once you’re adequately sad, switch tabs and watch OG "Keeping Up With The Kardashians." Start with that episode Khloe and Kourtney hang out with the homeless guy they find outside Dash. I wonder how Shorty’s doing these days.

15. Lay in bed with a book you’re trying to read until you fall asleep.