"You are what you settle for." - Janis Joplin
I never thought that six words could hit me as hard in the stomach as the ones from the above quote have. So simple, yet so powerful. Read it again. You are what you settle for. Let's break this quote down.
According to the dictionary, settling is defined as "accepting or agreeing to something that one considers to be less than satisfactory." Why would anyone personally accept something that is any less than okay? If someone finds something to be "less than satisfactory," wouldn't they strive to do better? Wouldn't they want to get out of that situation to find something they deserve? Huh... that's interesting. So, what do we deserve? What do we think we deserve? This is where this whole topic begins.
Most people tend to settle now-a-days more than ever. We find someone that's pretty great, but also pretty not-so-great. You could be in a relationship with someone who doesn't treat you the way you should be treated, but you stay with them because you'd rather deal with it than be alone.
You could be crushing on that guy that's totally not your type, but you hope that in some way you'll "change him." You could be in a career that you absolutely hate, but the salary is too good to leave. You could be in a friendship that's completely negative, but you've been friends with them way too long to cut them out of your life.
There is always that "but." You're so comfortable with the situation you are in, that you're scared to start over fresh or let go of that connection you've gotten so accustomed to. You think, "Oh, it'll get better eventually, I just have to stick it out." Honestly, they probably aren't going to change, and neither is this situation. You can't control someone else. You can only control the "control-ables."
It starts with you. You, you, you. You decide how your life will turn out with every decision you make, relationship you have, and situation you settle in. When Janis says, "you are what you settle for," she's one-hundred percent correct. What and who you settle for defines who you are and the life you have.
So, if you want kindness, love, or happiness, whatever it is that you want, don't settle for anything less. Stop going for guys (or girls) that are just available to you instead of waiting for the right one. Stop dreading getting up out of bed everyday and find something that drives you. Stop holding onto that toxic friendship, and just let them go. I promise once you decide to make the change, you'll finally stop settling for what your given and you'll desire what you deserve.
I was always told, "The world doesn't owe you anything," and with that statement I do agree. But, we all deserve happiness and love in this life. So surround yourself with family, friends, and opportunities that embody that. Don't settle for anything less. Remember that when it comes down to it, high expectations never hurt anyone. It just means you want what's best for yourself. You want what you deserve.
