If there was a statement to describe my life as of right now it would most certainly be, ‘How many times can I be asked ‘what are you going to do after graduation?’... The limit does not exist.’
Okay, sorry to get all "Mean Girls" on you, but I’m pretty sure it’s totally accurate. Although I try to forget sometimes, the reality is that I am graduating in May of next year and that is terrifying. What am I going to do after they hand me the diploma and I hopefully don’t trip while walking off the stage? Well, that is the million dollar question now, isn’t it?
I don’t know what I am going to do after I graduate. I’ve got a couple of options, but I am not one of those people who has a job lined up well before turning my tassel. Do I go to grad school right away? Do I apply to jobs on the other side of the country to start fresh and make big moves? Or what if I end up living back at home and jobless? While my heart started beating faster just while typing those questions, I have learned a thing or two lately.
Mostly, I’ve gotten to the point though that I am okay with not knowing. I love the journey I am on and I refuse to sit here and wish I had all the answers. I am a big believer in what is meant to be will be and where you are meant to end up you will. In fact, my life until now has been a true testament to that. After not getting into my dream college, changing my major five times, losing close friends, and many other challenges, in these past few years I have learned so much about myself and who I want to be.
I can confidently say that I am walking into my second semester of senior year a changed, but stronger person. I think back to the times I thought I knew the answers to what I was going to do and where I was going and I have to laugh because I was quite wrong. I don’t know where I am going or what I am going to do, but I know the woman I want to be. I have faith that it will all be okay.
We're always looking for what's next. We can't seem to settle for what's in front of us in the present and we want more. If you want to know what I'm doing after I graduate, the answer is I don't know, and whether you find that acceptable or not, I don't care. I'm only 21 years old and although the real world is quickly approaching, I get to decide what I want that to look like. Someday. But first, finals.
