I Don't Do Half-Ass Friendships

I Don't Do Half-Ass Friendships

I recently told someone "I don't want a friend group" and they looked at me like I was insane, but let me explain.
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Since before I can remember, I have been a part of friend groups but always been closer to two or three people in the group. Sure, I sometimes enjoyed the other people's company, but at the end of the day, I would choose those two or three people to hang out with and I cared to know about their lives significantly more than the others.

As I have gotten older and busier, I have no desire to be friends with people who I'm not super close to. I recently told someone "I don't want a friend group" and they looked at me like I was insane, but let me explain.

During my freshman year of college, I learned the difference between party friends and real friends. Party friends you go out with and you hang out with them sober occasionally, but there are very rarely deep conversations and at the end of the day they know very little about you. When there are hard times, they will not be a shoulder to cry on or a person to rant to and you can't be surprised if they stab you in the back.

Real friends are people that value your friendship and genuinely care about you. They are the people that you stay in touch with no matter how busy you get or how far away they are and the people that you feel so incredibly grateful for. I am not going to go into details in this post, but the second semester of my freshman year was very hard on me. I had a major falling out with some friends and someone that meant a lot to me, and I realized that I wasn't giving enough attention to the few people in my life that genuinely cared.

I started to spend my time on my genuine friends, family, and church, and that helped me more than I can put into words. That period of my life taught me so many lessons and now I am thankful for it, but at the time it was horrible.

Today, I don't care to have party friends. I have real, genuine friends who I love and value so much and that will listen to me cry or rant any day. Yes, we go out together and have a blast, but we also do so much more. I know about problems in their personal life and they know about mine. They laugh at me when I tell them how thankful I am for them, but seriously I know I can be a lot to handle, so thank you. My circle is smaller these days, but I am so much more invested into these friendships and happier.

I recently texted someone "If you don't want to talk to me, then tell me. Don't do this." This was sent to someone who means so much to me and someone that I used to tell literally everything to. I've realized that no matter how much you want it, you can't force someone to talk to you and care about you. Sometimes, real and genuine friendships do fade away and that's okay. I'm not going to be begging for someone to be in my life anymore, because I want people in my life who choose to be there.

At the end of the day, I am so grateful for and content with the people in my life and I am glad that I have had bad friends in the past because I now realize how lucky I am and I have learned how important it is to value your friendships and be a good friend to others.

So again, thank you to all my friends who deal with me on a daily basis. I love you all so much.

Cover Image Credit: Victoria Shore

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An Open Letter To My Best Friend On Their Birthday

because your existence is something worth celebrating
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An open letter to one of my best friends on their birthday...

Hey,

First of all, I probably love your birthday more than you because it's a day solely dedicated to your existence, and no one appreciates that more than me, and this is why.

You are always my number one. When I need someone to listen to my day, you're there, offering a hug on a bad day, a shoulder to cry on when I'm upset, or just a few words to reassure me. Most importantly, you make me laugh. Even if I'm in a bad mood, you make me laugh. When I should be embarrassed, instead I just laugh. And when I do something ridiculous myself, you make me laugh with you about it as well. Nothing can go wrong with my partner in crime there to watch my back, and of course you know I've got yours too.

You never know where this next year will take you, but why should that stop you. I hope this is a year where you smile a lot, learn a lot, and love a lot. I hope you discover something new and exciting, hold on to what you've always loved before, and find something unexpected that will amaze you like nothing else, because honestly those are the best surprises. Just remember to take me with you if you are jumping on that bus, train, or plane to explore, because you're not getting away from me that easily.

Not going to lie, some things will change. Nothing can stay exactly the same forever. But there will always be one fan cheering you on, a person to laugh with who loves you unconditionally, and a sarcastic friend who will keep you in your place while still supporting you to no end. And why is this? Look back at all those years (wow, you're getting old), and look at the kind of person you've become. You're pretty darn awesome if I do say so myself- you make the job of 'proud friend' easy for me. But then again, why do you think we're friends in the first place? I knew you were amazing before, now you're just old(er) and amazing. We'll take every curve ball the world throws at us and throw it back even harder, once I actually learn how to throw.


Here's to another year of adventures. Here's to watching movies and videos that we will quote for months, to eating ice cream and having 5-hour phone conversations. Here's to quoting songs and never being afraid to dance along (or have you laugh at me as I dance and sing along). Here's to the board games that you may beat me at one day, but not today. Here's to me being clumsy and stubborn and you being slightly less clumsy but just as stubborn. Here's to playing would you rather and knowing random facts about each other because of it. Here's to pizza at midnight, pancakes at noon, and cake on birthdays. Here's to another year of having you as my best friend.

Happy Birthday!

Forever and Always,

Your person

Cover Image Credit: pinimg.com

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15 Reasons Why You Should Join Greek Life

Letters today, leaders tomorrow.

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Are you on the fence about joining in on Greek life? You're not alone. Maybe you aren't sure if it's for you, or if you want to go through the rushing process entirely. Everyone has doubts about the outcomes of their choices, but your experiences are determined by what you make of it. I believe that joining Greek life will not only shape your college years but it will develop you into a leader for the future. Here are 15 reasons why Greek life could be for you:

1. You will become extremely involved on campus.

Jessie Searles

There is no better way to get involved on campus than by getting involved with Greek life. You will not only hold your own campus events, but you will attend other Greek organizations to support and learn about their fundraisers and philanthropies.

2. The social aspect.

Kayla Miller

Going Greek is another great way to meet tons of new people and get out of your comfort zone.

3. Greek life will help you get involved in philanthropy and service.

Purdue Phi Mu

Every fraternity and sorority has an organization that they're passionate about. Joining a chapter can introduce you to a new charity organization with a great cause.

4. You will find your lifelong friends.

Purdue Phi Mu

With so many students on campus, you can often find yourself feeling lost in a sea of people. Joining a chapter not only allows you to find friends with similar interests, but a family as well.

5. You will find your home away from home.

Jessie Searles

Being part of a Greek organization can immediately find you a place on campus to call home- and campus will start to feel a lot smaller.

6. You will get help with your academics.

Kayla Miller

Academics are one of the most important and stressful parts of your college experience. Your fraternity or sorority chapter will be willing to help you throughout your academic journey.

7. You have the opportunity to be a leader in your community.

Kate Lorenzen

There are so many opportunities to take on a leadership role in your sorority or fraternity. Each position requires a lot of passion, hard work, and dedication since they help each chapter run smoothly and efficiently.

8. You have the opportunity to obtain scholarships.

Kate Parks

Specific chapters, honor societies, and Greek organizations offer several scholarships to their members. This can help to immensely ease the cost of student living and tuition.

9. You will learn valuable life skills.

Ella Bogart

You learn to communicate with those in your sorority or fraternity and work closely with others in an effort to accomplish a mutual goal. Other general skills include public speaking, planning, time management, leadership, and prioritizing your responsibilities.

10. You have an additional housing option.

Kate Lorenzen

You can have all of the benefits of being close to campus without all the chaos of living in a residence hall. Additionally, you'll be able to build even stronger connections with your fellow sisters or brothers if you choose to live-in your Greek house.

11. You will never feel alone.

Kayla Miller

When you join a family of over 100 sisters or 100 brothers, there is always someone to hang out with and turn too.

12. You will never feel bored.

Jessie Searles

Between all the events, fundraisers, community service, new friendships, socials, meetings, and general "down time" with your chapter, how could you ever be bored?

13. You will continue to network beyond college.

Purdue Phi Mu

Being in a Greek organization is a lifelong membership. Not only will you gain plenty of contacts, you will have plenty of meaningful experiences to add to your resume after graduation.

14. You become part of long-standing tradition.

Kate Parks

Make a difference and be a part of something great. The impact of Greek organizations will continue change the world for the better.

15. You will enhance your overall college experience.

Lauren Hernandez

You won't just find friends here, but a family full of unconditional love and support. You'll be surrounded by people who want to help and see you succeed. You'll make the best memories, and goodbyes will become harder. You won't regret choosing to rush, to go through recruitment, and to decide where you'll spend the next few years of your life with your new brothers or sisters- to go Greek.

"Celebrate we will, for life is short but sweet for certain." - Dave Matthews
Cover Image Credit:

Lauren Hernandez

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