When misogyny plays a vital role in our politics, sports, and television shows, there is no wonder domestic violence has become a common occurrence in neighborhoods across America. As Attorney General Jeff Sessions reverses a ruling on immigrants seeking asylum from domestic and gang-related violence, my neighbor was beaten by her partner in the middle of the night.
I live in a quiet, gated apartment community with tight security. Late last weekend, however at 2:30 am, I was awakened by a man's voice, yelling obscenities at my neighbor as he knocked her into walls and slammed around the cottage home attached to mine. If it horrified me just to hear it, I can't imagine what she must have experienced. I called security and told them to come quickly, she was being assaulted. The man I spoke with was hesitant and I had to insist he come right away. He asked if it warranted a call to the police and I said if he did not come I was going to call them next.
Approximately ten minutes later I heard the knock on my neighbor's door and the apartment went silent. I felt a sense of relief and went back to sleep only to be awakened again at 4:30 am with more yelling and loud music. I laid in bed and listened for the police or someone to intervene and nothing happened. As my alarm went off a 5:00 am I dressed for the gym and walked outside only to hear his yelling as plain as day. I could hear him down the street as I walked away from our building. When I returned his car was gone and the lights in the cottage house were dark.
Later that afternoon I went to the office to speak to the administration regarding this incident. I was told it was a private matter and would be dealt with by the police. I asked if I could file a statement or a complaint against the man who assaulted my neighbor. He kept insisting the police are handling the matter, and there were privacy issues that he could not discuss with me. There only recourse he stated was eviction and I was appalled at the idea that this man thought it was a solution for this victim. I insisted that she needs help not rejection and to please find a better solution.
Here are the facts regarding domestic and dating violence from the US Department of Justice site:
1. Domestic/dating violence is a pattern of controlling behaviors that one partner uses to get power over the other which includes physical violence or threat of physical violence to get control, emotional or mental abuse, and sexual abuse.
2. 85% of domestic violence victims are women.
3. 1/4 of women worldwide will experience domestic/dating violence in their lifetime. Women between the ages of 20 to 24 are at greatest risk of becoming victims of domestic violence.
4. Domestic violence is most likely to take place between 6 pm and 6 am.
5. The costs of domestic violence amount to more than $37 billion a year in law enforcement involvement, legal work, medical and mental health treatment, and lost productivity at companies.
6. As many as 324,000 women each year experience intimate partner violence during their pregnancy.
7. Boys who witness domestic violence are 2 times as likely to abuse their own partners and children when they become adults.
8. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women – more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.
9. 1/2 of all homeless women and children in the U.S. are fleeing from domestic violence.
10. Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten.
11. In 60% to 80% of intimate partner homicides, no matter which partner was killed, the man physically abused the woman before the murder.
Don't turn a blind eye or a deaf ear when it comes to domestic violence. Call security, call the police, stop the pattern before it is too late for the victim.
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