When the word “illness” comes to mind, the majority of us automatically think of something physical, like a cold or the flu. But what about the illnesses we can’t see? Why is it that in today’s society, having a mental illness isn’t a valid excuse for not feeling well but having a physical one is? Oftentimes, people want to believe only what they can see with the naked eye. But just because we can’t tangibly see it, doesn’t mean that it isn’t actually there.
Growing up with a mental illness, I continually struggled with explaining myself when I felt ill.
I felt the need to lie to people on the days when my illness got the best of me, because saying, “I have a cold,” is easier for others to understand than “I’m feeling depressed today.” When I woke up feeling unmotivated and hopeless, it was easier to just tell my mom that my stomach was hurting. People don’t like to get into complicated details. So if they can see it clearly in front of their own two eyes, they can easily comprehend it.
When you tell people that you’re depressed, they say something like, “Just look on the bright-side,” or “There are people who have it a lot worse than you.” When you’re having an anxiety or panic attack, people tell you to “calm down” and that “you’ll get over it.” There isn’t an option under those excuse notes for mental illness. Because after all, feeling miserable and devastated is just a "personal" problem that everyone deals with, right? Why couldn't I just suck it up? All these remarks do is make the situation even worse. No one sees mental illness on the same plane as physical illness. But if I had the flu or a broken bone, people would act a lot differently.
You don’t tell someone with a broken leg to just “walk it off.” You don’t tell someone on antibiotics they shouldn’t be taking medicine because “it changes you” and suggest that they try changing their diet in order to feel better. No one says that because that would be absolutely ridiculous. We have a universal understanding that illnesses like sinus infections and pink eye are chemical problems within your body. Well, it’s the exact same deal when it comes to mental illnesses. So why is there such a noticeable difference in how we behave towards the two?
Even when you finally explain to people the depth of your situation, they still seem to have a difficult time accepting it. People get upset and question you as to why you didn't just tell anyone in the first place. But it's not that easy to just admit to someone the truth behind why you weren't at school or didn't go to that party. I can't tell you how many times people would ask me, "But were you really sick?" People don't like things that they don't understand. They're afraid of them. So the idea of being ill in any other way than physically is a foreign concept to most.
When something malfunctions in our bodies, we naturally assume that medical assistance is required. But when something goes wrong in our heads, people assume that we have complete control over our brains. People are so encouraging about seeking help when it comes to something that is physically affecting us in a negative way. In fact, if you don't seek help, people take it upon themselves to get the help for you. But when something's mentally hurting us, it's assumed that we can just "figure it out on our own."
Surprisingly enough, mental illnesses can end up leading to physical illnesses. Sometimes when we're in so much mental pain, we can physically strain our bodies to the point of exhaustion. I would often push myself to feel physically ill just so I could forget about my mental illness and convince myself and others that's all it was – a physical illness. Because if I could believe it, I didn't feel as guilty. But I shouldn't have had to feel guilty for something that was out of my control. People have built up such a negative stigma around mental illnesses that people who actually suffer from one or some feel ashamed of themselves. No one is ashamed when they get strep throat or a fever, because no one shames them into feeling that way. So the question remains, why is feeling mentally ill any different?
Having a mental illness is every bit just as valid as having a physical illness. Just because people can’t open up their minds and see past the surface doesn’t mean that your illness isn’t real. How someone looks or sounds shouldn't determine what qualifies as being sick. No one should ever have to be questioned for stating that they don't feel well. It doesn't matter whether or not the person looks perfectly fine, because not every issue happens on the exterior. The only thing people should be worrying about is the health and well-being of those around them because in the end, physical illnesses and mental illnesses aren't all that different.
