One of the traditional legends about starting college is the Freshmen 15. Now while many girls will shirk (shirk- what a word. Just say it- shirk- crazy huh). the dining hall in fear of gaining a single ounce, I look forward to the freshman 15. I was never the biggest kid in high school, as my visible ribs can attest. I try to avoid (or shirk) barbecue joints because they may think I am a set of ribs for a meal, despite having no meat on the bone. But I digress. I figured since I had difficulty gaining weight, I could bulk up by eating as much as possible, and going to the gym. I didn’t go to the gym much in high school, partially because I have no motivation, and also because I am lazy. However, in the first few months of school, I have raised my dedication levels by going with a group of friends. Each of these friends somewhat resembles an archetype for going to the gym. I’m also looking to lose my friends, so I figured, what’s a better way to lose a few friends than by talking about them online?

1. The Expert. This friend has been going to the gym since he was born, so naturally he has a six pack, does CrossFit, and embarrasses us when we attempt any exercise. More specifically, he provides us with workouts to do when we don’t want to be able to move the next day. He is also able to give any advice, like taking weight off a barbell during benching before crushing a windpipe.
2. The Runner. One of my other friends is a soccer player and loves cardio. I'll occasionally see him crushing out five miles while I’m moving at my typical shuffling pace. Basically any aerobic activity is right up his alley, whether it be rowing or the insane ab workout we do to end each workout. (Thanks, Mr. Expert.)
3. The Athlete. Then there is another friend who wrestled in highschool, and thus looks like his favorite hobby is crushing rocks. He is typically working on his own, despite coming with us, because his weights are so much higher. There is no way to get his attention, because he is constantly blasting music, so we practically have to interrupt his workout (Never a good idea- throwing medicine balls may be against gym etiquette, but it’s his favorite exercise, and I don’t like to get hit).
4. Me. Then there is me, the one who is just bewildered people can lift weights as heavy as they do. At this point, I’m just trying to keep up - on the treadmill, that’s in a literal sense. I do what I can though, and it turns out straining your muscle fibers until they tear and heal again is actually a fun activity. By the end, I am just waiting for that first sip of protein shake, even if it tastes terrible. I’ll do anything to get bigger, even if that means slacking off on the exercises to check my weight every so often on the scale at the gym. But hey, I’ve gained ten pounds, so I must be doing something right. Unless it’s the pizza and soda I eat every day. That’s probably not healthy.