I met my now-fiancé while studying abroad in Granada, Spain during the summer of 2016. His bright blue eyes caught mine during our orientation at the University of Granada before classes even began.
After about three weeks of classes, building our friendship, and traveling all across the southern border of Spain with twenty friends, Jake asked me on a date. It wasn't one of those "hey want to grab food sometime" kind of date proposal. It was clear, straightforward, and extremely romantic.
Our first date spanned across 8 hours, and began by walking to Los Italianos to eat gelato, followed by strolling through the Arabic market in downtown Granada and then up to the Alhambra to look over the city. We then met up with a group of friends for tapas and a music and dance festival that evening.
As he walked me back to my host family's home, we exchanged meaningful life stories and lots of laughter. Jake and I sat on the steps leading up to my host family's home and discussed what we wanted dating to look like. Jake told me who he had called before asking me on a date, and what they had discussed that led him to pursue me.
He shared why me, and why now. You see, this date was both our first first dates ever. At twenty years old, we had never dated anyone else. We built our relationship from scratch, really made it our own in every way.
Our first date in Spain
Two weeks ago, my Spanish amor proposed to me.
Since then, I have put a good amount of thought into the differences between boyfriend material and husband material. Over the past year and a half of dating the love of my life, I have found a handful of things that can help set apart boyfriend material from husband material.
While pursuing and being pursued by my future husband, I have been affirmed that Jake will be capable of all of the things a husband should be for their wives. Here are a few of the differences between boyfriend material and husband material:
1. Boyfriends pursue you, husbands lead you.
2. Boyfriends care for you, husbands provide for you.
3. Boyfriends aren't afraid to talk about the future, but husbands plan for the future with you.
4. Boyfriends challenge you to grow personally, husbands grow alongside you.
5. Boyfriends listen intently to your dreams and goals, husbands help make those a reality.
Although this is not an extensive list and does not need to be followed like scripture, it should bring up talking points with your significant other (or give you ideas of what to look for in a s/o).
Gals - know your worth. Remember that you are wonderfully and beautifully made. Have high standards and never sacrifice them. Wait for the man who will lead you, provide for you, plan for the future with you, grow alongside you, and will help make your dreams and goals a reality.
If you ever find that your boyfriend or the guy you are hoping soon becomes your boyfriend, doesn't even fulfill the "boyfriend material" requirements, definitely seek out advice from close friends and family on whether or not that is a relationship you should be pursuing.
You, my friend, deserve everything in this world, but if you find a man chasing the stars alongside you, make sure you could see him fulfilling these roles someday.
