Death Is A Different Kind Of Sadness

Death Is A Different Kind Of Sadness

It doesn't come close to dropping your burrito bowl on the carpet.
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Death is a different kind of sadness.

It isn't the kind of sadness you get when you find out the love of your life has cheated on you.

It doesn't compare to crashing your car, or failing in school.

It has no similarity to the feeling you get of being fired, or being yelled at work for being negligent.

It doesn't compare to nasty and mean people being aggressive to you online,

and it doesn't come close to being rejected by your crush.

It isn't the type of sadness you feel when you are called fat, ugly, or "not my type".

It isn't the kind of sadness you feel when you've let your parents down,

or when you've made someone cry out of being hurt by you.

It isn't the kind of sadness when you've just felt out of place and humiliated for whatever reason.

It isn't the same as losing a competition, losing your home, or losing your god damn mind.

Death is a different type of sadness,

a different type of sadness in which you would trade death for any of the above,

or whatever else you think that makes you god awfully sad.

I can't remember the last time I've felt this kind of sadness, but death is a much different kind of sadness.


Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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To The Girl Who Is Fine With Not Being OK, It's Time To Address Those Issues

It may not have seemed like addressing your issues was a big deal, but addressing them is the first step to resolving them.

bxccann
bxccann
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Confrontation has always driven you: away from your problems, away from your friends, away from yourself. You have become a person who loves helping others, but I ask you this: where is that compassion for yourself?

When things get tough, it's hard to distinguish what exactly may be the root of the issue. Oftentimes, it's easier to clump your emotional disarray into a response like "Well, I'm here," or "I don't know [what the problem is]." That response is where it stops. You find yourself questioning not what the source of these feelings is but rather how you can mitigate the number of questions being thrown your way about how you feel or why you seem so out of it.

You need to take a step back. Reflect. Assess. Process. Proceed.

Nothing good will seem to happen until you take a step back. In some cases, you may need to take a few. You take on new projects, more work, and more responsibilities. Instead of confronting yourself, you are building a shelter around yourself. It's easy to interpret this as moving on - have you thought about the impact?

There could eventually be a time when things go well. Your shelter is secure, warm, and you feel like you can finally breathe after your efforts.

There could also be a time when things do not go well. Your shelter, so trusted, falls. Suddenly, you face the storm that was brewing just outside of its walls. Trapped and scared, you're left to confront the mess and the storm outside, that emotional storm that you have inside of you, or scramble to pick up the pieces.

More often than not, you rebuild. And rebuild. And rebuild.

How many times must you barricade yourself in and not allow yourself to feel before you lose sight of yourself? Each time your shelter falls, the mirror cracks. It doesn't seem so bad at first. A hairline fracture in the glass. Repeat the process enough and there won't be a mirror left at all.

You may not have to pick up the pieces, but rather the shards in order to save it: your self-image. The way you view yourself affects not only the way that others view you but who you are and how you interact with the world and the people around you.

One day, you'll hit an epiphany. You deserve the same care and love that everyone does. You deserve to feel OK.

The storm brewing inside you is terrifying. After spending so long in your makeshift home, it may seem even more daunting.

It's OK to be scared. It's OK to not know what will happen in the eye of the storm. The most important part is that you experience the rain. Dance in it, play in it, and more importantly, accept it.

The rain will cease, and the sun will come. The wave of relief that washes over your skin will leave you wondering why you ever hid from the initial problem in the first place.

The next time you encounter this crossroads of confronting the issue, you may find yourself looking to build that shelter again, and that's alright. You are human, and only you can find the inspiration to address the issue.

When the time comes to bring a little light on yourself, just remember: take a step back. Reflect. Assess. Process. Proceed. Repeat until the problem is solved.

One day, you won't rely on that shelter. I'm rooting for you.

bxccann
bxccann

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