Dear Julia,
Mom has always told you how beautiful you are. She has always said you have smiling eyes that shine when you are really and truly happy. I’m sure when she tells you this, you smile bashfully and tell her to stop because you don’t believe you do. And I’m sure you will always wonder what that gleam in your eyes looks like to other people – if it really is there at all. But I want you to know that it is there, and you have to trust and believe that it is.
No matter how ugly you feel on your worst days, or how “fat” you may think you are, you are beautiful and you are loved. Your eyes still twinkle when you’re happy, and you are always worthy of living. You are going to meet a lot of people in your life who are going to try to convince you otherwise. Boys, girls, women, and men – you will encounter many people of various ages, ethnicities, and genders who will say or do something cruel to try to steal your smile away – the smile that graces your lips and the smile that gleams in your hazel eyes. You won’t let them, but know you will be challenged and faced with a lot of people whose personal demons influence the way they treat you, and sometimes with the intent to cause you harm.
From the boy who will call you fat in 8th grade math class, to the girl who will call you fat in college, to the boy who will break your heart for the first time, and to the first best friend who will betray you, they will all teach you a valuable lesson, but you have to be strong. Some days you will feel like giving up. One day you may find yourself in the darkest possible place, and you will feel as if there is no way out but to give up on life and yourself. But there is always light in the darkness, and you will learn how to save yourself from the hardest of life’s challenges. You are no damsel in distress. You are a queen, and one day you will understand your power to change the world – specifically, your world.
When you are older, you will thank the people who commit evil against you. It sounds crazy, but you will. You will thank them for showing you how strong you truly are, and for building up your resilience. You will thank them for the lessons you learned, the tears you shed, and the multiple times you had to pick yourself back up again and put your pieces back together. Each time you rebuild your puzzle, though, you will be different – changed for the better whether in personality, physicality, mentality, or emotionality. But your eyes will always sparkle and the very essence which is Julia will never change.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do something you want to do. Go to college for dance. Add a second major. Apply for that internship, and audition for the job you want. Never put yourself in a box, and never let other people put you in the box they are in. Think big, dream big, live big. Other people will always want you to stay at their level, but don’t ever settle for their level of satiety. Be hungry – for adventure, for a challenge, for an exciting life. Take risks in your career, in love, and in life.
Last but not least, know you are loved. You are loved deeply. God loved you first, so put Him first. Your parents and family loved you next (and still do), so always make them a priority. Treat your close friends (you’ll know who they are) with respect, and make sure you remind them how important they are to you. They will make sure they return the same kind of love to you. Love yourself. You will slowly but surely learn how to love and appreciate your own beauty, intelligence, capabilities, personality, and your body. You might always battle with self-love and acceptance, but know you are always taking small strides to come to a place where you do. Some days you will feel extremely lonely, and yearn for another human to love romantically. One day you may find someone you want to love for forever, but make sure he loves you back, and maybe even loves you a little bit more than you love him (if that is even possible). You deserve to be loved deeply and truly by another who wants to put your happiness before his own. Let him, and return the love back three fold. I’m sure he’ll tell you he loves the way your eyes smile and shine with light.
Julia, you hold limitless potential, power, and skill. Your brain has an endless capacity for knowledge, so never stop feeding it information. Believe in yourself. You can accomplish and will accomplish anything you set out to conquer. Be the light in someone else’s darkness, and be your own light when you fight through yours. Always hug people goodbye even when you’re mad, and never let negativity control your thoughts or actions. As you’ll learn in your practice of yoga, when you come to the fire, breathe through it. Breathe and smile, and shine your smiling eyes to the world because the world wouldn’t be the same without them.
Love,
Julia
