When it comes to living with any type of mental health issues it can be extremely difficult, even more so when you have the stress of college on your shoulders. Realizing and being diagnosed with mental health issues such as anxiety, panic attacks, and depression can be hard to come to terms with. I have been in a constant battle with these issues for around a year now; each day is a battle I must face with myself. Being away from home and dealing with the stress and life of college on top of my mental health at times can seem too much to handle.

When I first came to learn that what I had been feeling and experiencing for a while was due to my mental health I immediately sought out help. With the help of my doctor, I was able to understand what was going on with me and how I could go about to solve it. Depression has been the biggest struggle for me to face and I have to deal with it every day. Sadly, there is no off switch for any of the mental health problems I am facing, but there are ways for me to manage those feelings to the best of my ability.

My depression set in after I decided to stop doing color guard, a sport that I had been fond of for the past five years and an activity in which I poured my heart and soul into. When I took that aspect out of my life I realized I had been isolated in this continuous bubble for so long that once out of it, I felt all alone. Moving away from home and leaving the state for college for many people is a struggle in and of itself, I thought for sure that I would be an exception and that I would be able to handle it.

For the first semester of my freshman year at college, I engulfed myself into my studies and color guard and trying to manage this new life of being on my own. It was not until the spring semester of that year when everything began to change. I started to have major health problems, ending up in the hospital numerous times, needing procedures and tests done. My mental health we would soon learn was causing me to have physical health problems. Many people do not realize that your mental health can cause actual physical health issues.

Going through the ups and downs of not feeling as though I fit in anywhere, neither at college or back home. Feeling as if I had no one to turn to and no friends left in my life, my world began to spiral out of control. I no longer was interested in going out and doing fun activities or even wanting to show up to class.

Day by day I fought to get out of bed, even over the summer while I was back home with my family, I had little desire to want to participate in things. The only thing that seemed important to me was sleep and being able to escape the world in which surrounded me. My depression was growing deeper by the day and it was not until I opened up my heart fully to my Lord and savior again that I felt as if life had a purpose.

Surrounding myself in my faith and relying on God to provide for me and lead me down the right path was what started my journey to recovering and bettering myself mentally and physically. Sure, I still get anxious at times and feel as though nothing will work out for me, or panic to the point that I feel physically sick but taking the steps to better myself has made everything so much better. Opening up to not only my family but to a counselor at my school has made me realize that dealing with my depression and all of these negative thoughts that roam my head does not have to be a journey I take alone.

I have had some setbacks at times, especially when my relationship with my boyfriend at the time ended, or one of my best friends left my life, but I take each day at a time and have faith and trust that everything will work out in the end for me. So, if you are someone dealing with mental health yourself, never feel like you must walk this road alone and like others will not understand.

Trust me, there are many college students, young adults, adults, parents, etc. going through some of the same feelings you are. Reach out to someone, do not keep it all bottled up inside, there is help available and we each have a purpose in this world even if we may not think we do!