The start of a new school year is always a bitter-sweet feeling. The excitement of being reunited with friends, meeting new people, joining clubs and starting new classes comes naturally. That excitement can come with stress, however; stress over course-work, early morning classes, and, for students in long distance relationships, saying goodbye to their significant other.
Whether you and your S.O go to schools four, or forty hours apart- distance sucks. Plain and simple. But that doesn't mean your long distance relationship won't last.
There is a negative connotation associated with long distance relationships. Myths commonly shared regarding LDRs include:
- Both partners won't have their physical or emotional needs met
- One or both partners are being held back from enjoying their college experience
- Inevitably, one partner will cheat on the other
- Long distance relationships never last.
The flame will burn out. You'll get bored of them and meet someone new. It was doomed from the beginning. Nope. No. Not true. And stop listening to those people who say so.
Long distance relationships are hard work, but all relationships are. When you are with your S.O. you plan dates, find time to talk, maybe you even study together. It's the same for couples who are long distance. These couples find time to facetime each other, talk about their days, and even watch movies via video chat. (Yes that's a thing and don't knock it till you try it.)
Just like all couples, people in long-distance relationships argue. They fight, get jealous, get worried- it's natural. The only difference is, it's much easier to leave a digital conversation than it is to ditch one in person. A quick click of a button and you've ended the call- the argument is over… for now. In person, you and your S.O are forced to make up or break up. So what does that mean for couples in LDRs? You need to be extra patient and be great at communicating. And that may take time.
Patience and communication are both skills that need to be developed. It's unreasonable to think that you and your S.O will be able to work through every issue calmly from the start. As time goes on, however, you should be able to see the improvements being made on both sides of the partnership. Listening to each other's concerns, expressing your feelings, comforting one and other, being honest and showing signs of effort are necessities when it comes to dating long distance.
So, for those of you heading back to school and looking for ways to maintain your relationship status despite the distance between you and your S.O, here are some tips.
Communicate. Keep each other up-to-date on everything. Not in a controlling manner, but to stay in the loop and be active parts of each other's lives. Talk about your day and discuss even the irrelevant material.
Facetime! Facetime! Facetime! Learn it, live it, love it. You miss your S.O's face and they miss yours. So spend some digital face-to-face time when you can.
Do things over the phone that you would do if you were physically together. Pick a Netflix or Hulu series to watch together. Take BuzzFeed quizzes. Do homework together. Whatever it is, just include them.
Plan your next trip. It's much easier to say goodbye when you have an idea of when your next hello will be. This will give you both something to look forward to, instead of wondering when or if you will see each other again.
Always make time for each other. Effort is the number one things when it comes to LDRs. Show your partner that you want to be with them and are actively trying to make your relationship work.
All relationships have their ups and downs, but what matters is that you are both happy and you are facing these challenges with the person you care for.