“Dating” a word that’s been used for generations. Google defines dating as a “stage of sexual selection in humans whereby two people meet socially, possibly as friends or possibly with the aim of the other’s suitability as a partner.” Couples in the 21st century have become more open to a relationship that’s less on labels and more on the physical approach. Elizabeth Armstrong, a sociologist at the University of Michigan, states “The really big change in sexual practices among young Americans occurred with the Baby Boomer generation, that is the move toward premarital sex,” (“Tales From the Millennials' Sexual Revolution”,2014) Unlike the past years in which sex was a sacred act it seems that sex has become more of a casualty amongst the younger generation.
In the late 1800’s dating was seen as something trivial, and marriage was the main goal. A transition slowly happened as dating became more formal. Parent’s approval was needed, and as Pauline Go, a writer for Ezinearticles says “dating was synonymous with romantic relationship or courtship.” (Dating In America - Past and Present, 2008) Overtime, dating became infused with the digital world, and slowly more dating sites such as eHarmony, Match.com, BlackPeopleMeet, and Christian Mingle became sites for the working man and women on the go. These sites caused less people to meet from face to face interactions, and more people to meet by face to screen interactions. This wasn’t necessarily a bad thing as more people started to find love, and as The Huffington Post states “Meeting a spouse on-line is, on average, associated with slightly higher marital satisfaction and lower rates of marital break-up than meeting a spouse through traditional (off-line) venues.” (Online Dating Leads To Higher Marriage Satisfication, Lower Divorce Rates: Study, 2013) This means that more positivity has come from digital dating interaction than originally thought. Although unfortunately there were many negatives that came as dating trends were formed throughout the years.
In 2016 a new dating trend called “Ghosting” became a new thing in which two people start talking or dating online. The couple communicates almost every day, but after a while one of them stops communicating with the other. After a couple months or weeks one of them reaches out to the other with a weak excuse or no excuse about the lapse of time that has passed between messages. There’s also another term “Benching” which essentially is ghosting except a person does this to multiple people, and so when one person doesn’t respond, you have others to talk to. These trends are what gives dating online a negative reputation. Facttank states that “One-Third of people who have used online dating have never met the real person online.”( 5 facts about online dating, 2016) due to these dating trends.
Another horrid trend, is called Catfishing, which is when you lure someone into a
relationship by means of a fictional online persona. This is major epidemic which has caused people to lose money, personal belongings, and even be subjected to identity theft. For example, “Teenager Marissa Williams was living with her aunt in Tuscaloosa, AL, when her aunt asked her to stop using Facebook to lure male strangers into her home. In response Marissa blocked her aunt on Facebook. Her aunt created a fake persona named Tre “Topdog” Ellis and befriended Marissa on Facebook. To her aunt’s shock, Marissa began complaining to “Topdog” about how she wanted him to come and pretend to kidnap her and take her away from her overbearing aunt. She even allegedly gave him instructions on how to break into her aunt’s bedroom and kill her before pretending to abscond with Marissa. She also encouraged “Topdog” to kill her uncle, cousin, and dog. Marissa’s aunt took these messages to authorities, and Marissa was jailed and charged with solicitation of murder. “(12 Disturbing ‘Catfish’ Stories That Remind Us How Insane the World of Online Dating Is, 2015)
Dating Trends have changed majorly over time. While these changes have caused many positive interactions such as people from different states, countries, and even continents to interact, and allowing people to find themselves figuring out what dating style works best for them. Unfortunately, dating trends such as catfishing, benching, and ghosting will always give dating online a negative reputation. Though this could cause some to feel very wary about the dating world, and all that surrounds it, it all just depends on the person and how they choose to go about delving into the world of dating.
Bibliography
Go, Pauline. "Dating In America - Past and Present." Ezinearticle. EzineArticles, 28 Apr. 2008. Web. 11 Sept. 2016.
Morris, Alex. "Millennials and Sex: A New Take on Dating, Marriage and Monogamy." Rolling Stone. Rolling Stones, 31 Mar. 2014. Web. 11 Sept. 2016.
Reich, Ashley. "Online Dating Leads To Higher Marriage Satisfaction, Lower Divorce Rates: Study." The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 4 June 2013. Web. 11 Sept. 2016.
Smith, Aaron, and Monica Anderson. "5 Facts about Online Dating." Pew Research Center RSS. N.p., 29 Feb. 2016. Web. 11 Sept. 2016.
Winters, Jessica. "12 Disturbing ‘Catfish’ Stories That Remind Us How Insane The World Of Online Dating Is." Thought Catalog. Thoughts & Expressions Co, 09 Sept. 2015. Web. 11 Sept. 2016.
