Before I get into this topic let me be honest and say that it is something I have always struggled with. I've been single for a little over 4 years, and I hate to admit that for the majority of that time I sulked in the status of my love life. To put it in simpler terms I just wasn't content. Even though I had some amazing things going on in my life I always let the fact that I didn't have a girlfriend bring me down. I had an amazing family, awesome friends, an incredible God, athletic ability, good grades, a great financial situation, the opportunity to study at a great college, and so much more, but I still thought my life wasn't complete without a girl by my side to enjoy it with me. I didn't just want a girlfriend.... I was desperate to get one. It got to the point where most of the conversations that took place between my friends and I consisted of me complaining about how I was never going to find a girlfriend (Yes I was that annoying friend).

This complaining was bad, but the worst side effect of my desperation was how it put a metaphorical brick wall between God and I. During that time I felt so distant from him. Our relationship was so strained because I exhausted all of my energy into trying to find a girlfriend instead of trying to find God's will for me. My mindset became so warped that at one point I started to ask God why he was doing this to me and blamed him for my situation. That was probably the lowest point of all, but then something happened...

I got a girlfriend!!!! Just kidding I didn't lol. That would have probably been the worst thing for me at the time because emotionally and spiritually I just wasn't ready for it yet. The amazing thing that happened was that God revealed some of his truth to me that has taught me how to be content in my singleness. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." (NLT). Now you may read this verse and say "Well Adam if God works everything for the good of those who love him then why don't you have a girlfriend?" Well, it is because God knows what is in our best interest even when we don't agree with him. I wanted a girlfriend so bad, but from my story even you can probably tell that I was nowhere near ready for one. Sometimes God withholds things or gives things based on what he knows is best for us because ultimately his will is much greater than anything we can ever imagine. Also, sometimes bad things just happen and we have to endure the struggles of them because the experiences of it makes us stronger in the end.

So back to the question: How can you be content in singleness? The real secret to being content while being single is to realize that God's will for everything (including your love life) is in your best interest. He is a loving father who just wants the best for all of his children who believe in him and look to him. I'm not going to lie, from time to time I still get a little down, but at the end of the day I can turn to God's word and realize that Jesus is enough. If we have him we have all we need. Yes I want a girlfriend and I don't know anyone who wants to be alone, but that isn't where I find my worth anymore. I find my value in the amazing sacrifice my God made for me, and the love he constantly pours out. Whether God decides to bring a girl into my life today, tomorrow, in a month, a year, a decade, or even never, I realize that he knows what is best for me which is such a comforting feeling!

I want to end by saying this: Please don't think I am saying you shouldn't have the desire to have a significant other. It is a God given desire to want to be in a relationship and eventually a marriage. This is all good stuff! Just be careful that you don't hold your relationship status as your primary concern in life because that is where the trouble can start. That spot on the throne of your life is for the God who breathed the life into you, and through his will you will have the best relationship you could ever imagine. That is what I want for myself and for everyone else; to experience a relationship with God in the center leading its every step. But until that day, stay focused on The Lord and I promise you will be content and feel whole. :)