6 Things To Remember If You're Someone That Argues A Lot

Before I begin, I should mention that I am guilty of everything I list below. It's not uncommon. Most people in the world are terrible at admitting fault when necessary. Therefore, this is a reminder to me and whoever else is struggling to be brave enough to recognize that no one is perfect.

1. Changing perspectives is natural

People change. It's part of life. As you continue to learn and grow, your perspectives and opinions of people and situations are going to change. They might even shift completely. You may end up supporting things you never thought you'd be, but it's okay.

2. Saying sorry shouldn't be hard

I know it's hard. I suck at it. The first step of just realizing and accepting you have made a mistake is hard enough. When you do though, don't continue the bickering for the sake of the argument. Saying sorry or making a simple gesture that you understand where the other person is coming from is really comforting to hear, and creates a more productive environment. It doesn't make you weak. It just shows you're smart enough to not let your pride get in the way of your judgment.

3. Don't feel trapped to a single opinion

Just because you have been a strong proponent of an opinion at one point does not mean you are not allowed to go against it later on. After reflecting for some time and acquiring new information, you may be in situations in which you realize you are wrong. You don't have to feel like you are "betraying" your opinion or selling yourself short by admitting you made a mistake. Opinions aren't meant to be stringent and rigid. A single opinion does not define and encapsulate you. Facts and informed ideas should be the priority, not the side or the party. Focus on the facts instead of the side you are on.

4. Discussion and disagreement are good

Don't be afraid to speak out about your thoughts and opinions. Avoiding confrontation because you think it's unnecessary drama or feeling like you'll be judged for your unpopular opinions is not valid. Admitting you don't know something does not make you dumb or stupid. This is a two-way street. If someone else that you are having a discussion with isn't aware of a topic or subject, do not shut him/her down. It's rude and insulting. You might find it surprising and even shocking at their ignorance but not everyone is as passionate and exposed to what you are. Take the opportunity of a conversation to educate, question, and put forth ideas. Don't come off as preachy and condescending, and don't shut others down and get easily offended. A balanced discussion can really help you voice your ideas better and learn more about other people.

5. Not everything is about winning

You can really tell a lot about people by observing their behavior during heated discussions. Are they headstrong? Are they willing to listen? Are they overly biased and ignorant? Are they willing to accept fault? If another person makes a valid point, are they willing to consider it, or just brush it off as irrelevant? It's important for people to understand that in a planet of 7.6 billion people, not everyone is on the same page as you. They haven't had the same experiences as you have, so stop having debates and conversations solely for the sake of winning them. You can't because we're all part of humanity and in this together.

6. Learning is a process, and being wrong is a part of it

Don't feel foolish or ashamed to be wrong. It's okay, I promise. Sometimes, for whatever reason, we support or do things that we regret later on. But these are the times you learn your biggest life lessons. So appreciate being wrong as an equal, if not a greater teacher of who you are and what you stand for.

Life would be so much easier to navigate if everyone could just treat mistakes as normal and not something to worry about. Mistakes can cause immediate and sometimes lasting damage and it's important to recognize and remedy them. But do not place so much importance on the simple idea of being wrong. It's really not a big deal. In the grand scheme of things, one person in the wrong isn't nearly as awful as an entire population that grows up stubborn and polarized.

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