“Wait, so you’ve never gone out? Or even had like, one drink? Not even at a party? What do you do on weekends? Aren’t you bored? Do you have any friends?”
These questions are all too familiar to me and to everyone else who has chosen to not drink during their college years, or at least until they are of age to legally drink. Everyone has their personal reasons. For some it could be health related, for others, it could be because that’s how they were raised. Some of us go out on Thursday nights and the only thing that will pass our lips is water. Some of us stay in our room or go to the library and do work.
No, I have never been to a party outside of family gatherings and friend’s birthday parties. I choose to avoid situations where alcohol is freely available to underage drinkers. The only alcohol I have ever consumed is a quarter glass of champagne at Christmas for the toast our family does. And even then, I usually do not finish what I have been given after taking the first sip.
Alcohol holds no interest for me. As someone who loves to control every aspect of her life, the idea of being out of control not only worries me, it terrifies me. I see people stumble back to their dorms at all hours of the night; dizzy, nauseous, clutching their stomach or their friend next to them for balance. I have watched the next morning chaos where people run to the bathroom to empty their stomach contents for the third time that morning because they drank too much the night before. The idea of sacrificing my health for a few hours of being tipsy does not seem worth it to me.
What strikes me as particularly amusing is the idea that because I do not drink, I must not have any friends. This, to the surprise of many it seems, is not true. I have friends in my dorm, in my classes, and in the organizations I am a part of. They do not care if I want to stay in on weekends, and they know they have someone to go to when they are feeling pressured by others to do something they may not want to.
Some people ask if this means I hate people who drink. And the answer is no, I could honestly care less if you drink or not. I believe it is a personal decision and I have no right to stand in anyone’s way of doing what they want. All I hope is that it’s being done in an environment that you feel safe in, with people you trust, and in a safe amount.
To wrap it all up for those who will still ask me a million and one questions:
I won’t take a sip of that drink, no matter how diluted it is.
I won’t come babysit you and your friends. Choosing to be sober does not mean I am choosing to be a babysitter or a sober monitor.
I don’t care how good of friends we are if you choose to drink around me, I won’t want to be around you anymore. You have to understand that my fear of watching you hurt yourself is greater than my desire to be your friend.
This all may sound very harsh, but it’s all the truth. I’ve seen a lot of my friends in high school get hurt by the effects of underage drinking. I have family members whose lives have been damaged by substances in the past. I see no need to lead myself down this path of self-destruction when I have a GPA to keep up and plants to water every day. I know not everyone may understand my choice, but as I said before it is a very personal decision, and one that must be made without the influence of your peers, your friends, or your society.
And if you are wondering, yes, it is possible to get through breakups, finals, family tragedies and failed tests without having a drink.
