If Coffee Shops Were Hope College Men | The Odyssey Online
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If Coffee Shops Were Hope College Men

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If Coffee Shops Were Hope College Men
Luke Chesser

With so many coffee shops vying for your attention, how can you pick which one to choose? Every coffee place is unique with its own set of quirks and personalities, kind of like the guys at Hope. Let me explain.


LJ’s

He definitely has a man bun. He’s a religion major and plays in chapel band. He wants to be in youth ministry, but he’s still praying to see where God takes him. You hope that God’s plan involves you. He’s super involved in Dance Marathon and makes sure to longboard wherever he needs to go.

Dream Date: The Gathering and a donut run. You know it’s official when he brings you to his home church.


Good Earth Café

He transferred from Calvin and is still trying to find his place. He seems cool though, we’ll give him a chance.

Dream Date: A picnic at the beach at sunset.


Biggby

He is smart, sweet, funny, sensitive, and a bit shy. You are hardcore friend-crushing him. He’s kind of short, but not really, you know? Plus, he knows a lot of random facts - input is one of his top five strengths (along with developer, achiever, harmony, and one other that he can never remember).

Dream Date: Frolfing and a VanderProv show.


JP’s

JP’s was a comm major, but after a lot of thinking, he switched to management last year. He’s a second-generation Hope student and his dad couldn’t be more proud. He has an athletic physique, but he doesn’t play sports, unless you count IM “competitive Co-ed Basketball”. His hair is beautiful- buzzed on the side with a swoosh on top - think Macklemore.

Dream Date: Dinner at Butch’s and a movie at the Knickerbocker Theatre.


Cool Beans

Somehow between sophomore and junior year he went from “drool to cool.” He grew a beard, bought new clothes and grew a few inches. He’s super Hope College: The Pull, Nykerk, Dance Marathon, you name it and he’s there. He’s the kind of guy that can keep a snap streak and you bet he’ll give out a ring by spring.

Dream Date: Netflix and chill, specifically "Gossip Girl."


Starbucks

What a guy. He was probably cool in high school, but who even knows anymore. He’s Pre-Med, lives in Durfee, the Vice President of his fraternity, and an outspoken supporter of Donald Trump. This summer he “worked” at his dad’s very profitable business and he constantly reminisces about his time at his lake house. You’ll find him wandering the Pine Grove in a Vineyard Vines shirt, Sperry’s, and his Patagonia hat on backward.

Dream Date: Any sorority date night.


Cup & Chaucer

He’s an English major who understands Walt Whitman in a way you never will. Secretly, he’s a great artist (charcoal and water paints) and he always wears his jeans with a cuff at the bottom. He’s the kind of guy you want to talk philosophy with. Plus, he’s BFFs with Biggby guy.

Dream Date: May term in Vienna.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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