So, a little background on me. My immediate family is full of nurses. My mom taught me how to perform CPR before I was even five. Our dinner topics included patient care, crazy medical stories, and new policies being created at work. When I was in elementary school, my mom went back to nursing school to get her RN, and I helped her study. Countless definitions and medical terminology before I even learn algebra.
So, I feel like it was basically required that I go into the medical field, and into the one thing my mom never really talked about - neurology. I centered my life around medicine and around neurology so much that I lost myself, and I didn't even notice it. When it came time to pick a college, I looked for ones with neuroscience as a major, and I don't know if you've ever looked but ... there isn't a lot of them. With the University of Kentucky being the cheapest of them, I started an application and I never turned back.
Once I started my classes in my first year I noticed that that feeling was gone.
The curiosity, excitement, love ... I mean of course science can be COOL, but it dawned on me that this would be what I was doing my ENTIRE life. And frankly, I hated how that sounded. I learned that doctors spend most of their time doing paperwork, most get burnt out quickly, they have high rates of suicide - a doctor's life isn't what it is on TV shows. There aren't always crazy cases, and you aren't always helping people. I learned more from my mom about how messed up many aspects are in the medical field. It's a money game, and its a game I didn't want to be a part of anymore.
Once I had this revelation, I spent a lot of time self-reflecting looking for what really made me happy. That turned out to be languages.
Japanese to be specific. Becoming a language major has probably been the best decision I've ever made. But, of course, when I told my mom she wasn't too happy with me. I was bombarded with her saying she didn't think I was making the right choice, and that this was a mistake. But, it made me happy, so I stuck with it.
The longer I'm in this major, the happier I feel.
I can see my future ahead of me more past just studying. I can finally see myself being happy and I'm finally currently happy. Sure, it's just a major, but changing and finding something I actually enjoy has also helped my depression. Waking up and doing something I actually enjoy with a future ahead of me that excites me is so amazing.
Changing your entire life plan and selecting a new path to walk down is absolutely terrifying. But, you're never too far down a path to stop and pick a different one.
Sure, it's scary but I'd rather be scared for a moment to find something I enjoy than stay comfortable but miserable in my career.
