Are you the type of person who feels the need to say yes to every single person who asks something of you?
Me too.
It doesn’t matter if I’ve got a million things to do before Monday and it’s Saturday night. If a friend wants me to meet them for drinks, I’m going out for drinks. If I have five hours to finish a portfolio that I pushed off completing until five hours before the due date, but my mom wants me to pick the dogs up from the groomer, I’m picking the dogs up from the groomer. If I haven’t gotten more than five hours of sleep a night for the last two weeks, but my sister needs me to wake up early to take her to school, guess who’s taking her to school? Little ol’ me.
I’m sure all of you yes-sayers out there can relate—I do this because I just want to make others happy. I don’t like to disappoint the people in my life. But, the truth is, not every one will do the same for you. It helps to remember that sometimes.
Every once in a while, you need to take a deep breath and realize that the most important person is you. Yes, you. And you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. Don’t get run down because you are out and about doing everything for everyone else and nothing for you. Take care of yourself first.
I know that this is hard for people pleasers everywhere. I struggle with it every day. If I have the chance do something for someone else, why wouldn’t I take it? Well, because I have an assignment due tomorrow and need my sleep. Or heck, I just don’t want to. Sometimes though, it’s hard to admit that to people, even harder to admit it to myself.
In reality, it’s often easier to come up with false plans than to tell a friend that you just don’t have time. So here’s my advice to you: make a list. Make a list of all the things that you could possibly have going on—babysitting, dinner with grandma, braiding your dogs hair—and put it somewhere accessible. Write it down, put it in your purse, in your pocket, type it up on your phone. And the next time someone asks you to do something that you just don’t feel like doing or don’t have time for, pull it out. Give them any excuse you want, and then do you. Because you are important too.
