When I read the word "break-up," a few words that instantly pop into my head are sadness, loneliness and heartbreak. There is such a negative stigma around the idea of two people breaking up, but it needs to end. Thinking back to my first relationship, I was naive and delusional, not knowing what a relationship was supposed to be like. No matter how unhappy or beat down I felt, the thought of a break up killed me simply because being alone was scary.

Going to school the next day with everyone knowing I just went through a breakup, having friends try and comfort me, I didn't want to go through that. I didn't want people to feel bad for me. I relied on my significant other for happiness, which ended up ruining me. I'm sure most can relate to searching for happiness in someone else, but over the years I have discovered what an awful idea that is to do.

Dating different people is apart of life, and break-ups are bound to happen whether we want them to or not. How will we know if we truly like someone's company until we see what else is out there? My mom always told me how you have to experience new people to know what you want in a boyfriend/girlfriend. As negative as it sounds, I have always viewed relationships as trial and error.

You're either going to break-up or marry the person you're with, so if it doesn't work out, it just wasn't meant to be.

You won't know for sure what you want in a significant other until you see what else is out there first. I know so many couples who dated throughout high school, broke up during college, then came back together after college because they realized their relationship truly was the best. "If you love something let it go."

Not only can break-ups help you realize what you really want in a significant other, but they can help you become a stronger person. Loving another person is hard to do if you don't love yourself first. Having high self-esteem and self-love makes loving another person a lot easier. Finding things you love to do or simply being alone and working on yourself may not always be options when immersed in a not-so-good relationship. Being on your own and having the time and flexibility to find yourself and what makes you happy and secure is crucial.

After my first break-up, I began going to the gym all the time and eating a lot better. I soon found my passion for working out and just staying healthy in general. I didn't have the time to do this while I was in my first relationship, which is just one of the reasons I am thankful I had the strength to call or a break-up. Ever since then, my confidence and sense of security has gone through the roof and I could not be happier. Just finding a simple hobby that you are passionate about can change your life in such a positive manner.

Now, I totally understand that some break-ups can be devastating and seem like the end of the world, but I promise they have their pros. You could end up way happier with someone else, but now know that until you experience a break-up. Bettering yourself and finding other things you love to do is just another plus. They may not seem all that great, but sometimes break-ups can be for the better.