This April marks the 13th year my siblings and I went to live with our grandparents. It certainly hasn't been the smoothest ride, but it's one I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world. You see, not many people get a second chance at life, but that's exactly what God gave us all those years ago.
I was 8 when we left our parents and 13 when I was adopted, but that's not the part I want to talk about. Instead, I would like to focus on the blessings of being an adopted child. First and foremost, being a part of an adopted family can hold one of the greatest loves. That saying, "You can't choose your family," doesn't hold here. When you're adopted, you've been chosen above anyone else. Of course, it was our grandparents who brought us in and not a stranger, but that love is just as strong. They've already raised children before and certainly didn't have to again, but they did. Not only did they choose us, but they came out of retirement and fought CPS for us for six years. They fought so that we could have an education, a family that loved us, and a better life all around. We called it our "forever home." In my humble opinion, they have succeeded. My adoption into this loving family has afforded me opportunities I never would have even had the chance to imagine with my biological parents. My life opened up the day our grandparents opened their door to us.
Tragically, not everyone is so blessed. Not all adoptive parents are as they should be, but many are. Of course there are times when I wrack my brain trying to figure out why my birth mother gave us up so easily, but the truth is I'm ultimately grateful she did. Did it hurt? Yes; it still does at times, but I know it was the strongest thing she had ever done out of love. I can honestly see where God worked His magic in my life. I'm more like my grandmother than my birth one and I look more like her too. The relationship I have with my now-mom is priceless. I often confuse people when I refer to my grandparents as my parents because that's all I see them as. When people ask about my real parents I do a double take. To me, they are my real parents. My brother and sister are my real siblings. I always forget that biologically, they are my half siblings. Although I may not look like my siblings or most of my family, I have never felt like I was different from my family. I never felt anything but loved.
If I've learned anything through this adoption, it's that family is more than blood. Don't get me wrong, I'm not diminishing the bond that comes with biological family, but that bond isn't always healthy and doesn't always have your back. Family, at least to me, are the people you can count on to love you and support you unconditionally. Its impact on me has been so great that someday, whenever I'm ready for children, I plan to adopt. There are thousands of children in our country and the rest of the world who don't have anyone to love them or look after them. Many of these children, like myself, grow up fearing rejection. If I could save even one child from this fate and give them a forever home of their own, that would be a miracle in and of itself.
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“My life has been shaped by the decision two people made... They decided to adopt a child. They got me, and I got a chance at the kind of life all children deserve.”
~ Karen Fowler
