Having a birthmark on your face, is pretty noticeable, so of course it sticks out a ton. I never really cared or thought about to growing up. People, especially little kids, would about it and I would answer their questions and never thought twice about it. That was until I was in middle school. Let's be honest here, middle schoolers are mean. Everyone wants to be "popular", and no one wants to be seen as "weird" or "different." I was labeled those things, and a lot more, because of my birthmark. And that is when it started to bother me that I had a birthmark on my face.
It more than bothered me, I straight up hated it. A lot of the time I wished that I never had one, or that I could get rid of it. I didn't have a lot of friends because no one wants to be friends with the weird kid. I mean people talked to me in class and stuff, but they would go behind my back and make up things and call me names. I did my best to just ignore it but when you're entire school, even people you don't know, are calling you really mean names, it's hard.
Now I laugh about these names and joke around about how dumb they sound, but I'm also 22 years old...when you're 11 you just bottle up all of your emotions and try your best to ignore them.
I wasn't going to mention this but I think it's important to share so people can get a better understanding of some of the names I was called. The most popular name for me was sh*t stain.
How can anyone try a build of confidence, and enjoy going out when a bunch of people are saying that to me when I walk by? I was in a band and I hated every second sitting the band room because when the band teacher is focusing on one instruments section, the people in your section are whispering names to you. When we had to share a stand, whether it was on my music or the other persons, somehow it would have something mean written on it.
I hated gym class, because of the locker room. The gym teachers, are either in the gym or in the hallway, so that meant to everyone else that they could bully me and call me names and get away with it.
For all my middle school years and even my high school years, I really tried my hardest to ignore what everyone said but when I went home I would just hide in my room. I stopped going out with the little friends that I had, and I pushed away a lot of people. I always thought that people were just my friend to be nice and to be seen as a nice person.
I really hated my face and hated my birthmark. I hated taking pictures and looking in the mirror because that's all I would notice. I felt like I was cursed because of it.
All that changed when I got to college, and when you get to college, no one cares about anything. We all go about our lives and we're all 18 and older, so we all realize that it's pretty childish to make fun of somebody for something that they can't control.
Throughout college, I stopped caring about what everyone used to say about me, and I started doing my own thing. In doing my own thing, I forgot would forget all about my birthmark until some random kind stranger would mention how much that they like it, or how cool it was because it's not often that somebody has a birthmark on their eye.
Now I realize how cool my birthmark actually is. Not that many people have it, I've only seen one other person with this sat birthmark but it was on the other eye, and it was years ago, and I haven't seen anyone else with it since then.
Today whenever I look in the mirror and take pictures, I don't even notice it and when I do, it doesn't tear me down, it builds me up because I've come to love it. It just reminds me of how unique and individual I am.