Ever since I could walk, I would watch Lucille Ball, star in I Love Lucy. Her humor and genuine heart in each episode inspired me from a young age. This morning I came across this quote, instantly realizing its value - especially to girls my age.
Today there is an abundance of false societal standards that young women innately feel the desire to accomplish - the perfect body, long hair, best clothes, newest car, the list lasts for centuries. Having goals is an essential part of life, only if the goals are in place for your personal aspirations. Media convinces young people to change themselves to fit the false mold portrayed online. After being bombarded with such standards and falsified perfection, I found that I started to love myself less. I began to dislike how I looked and certain personality qualities specifically because it contradicted perfection. Disliking myself made me miserable and dangerously self conscious. I instantly assumed people thought I was awkward and ugly (come to find out people thought I was awkward ONLY because I acted like the world thought I was; and I rarely found someone that thought I was downright ugly). Everyday I find me loving myself even more, and simultaneously gaining confidence in my own skin. Things that I would never do a year ago I do everyday now. How did I stop comparing myself to falsified perfection? Ultimately, how did I start loving myself?
First, I STOPPED COMPARING MYSELF. This was hard. It was hard to understand that I would never look like Selena Gomez or Nina Dobrev from The Vampire Diaries and I would never sound like Taylor Swift. But that’s because I’m not them and neither are you. I realized I did not have to copy their trends or wish I could sing like them in order to love myself. I stopped comparing my body to pictures on tumblr and I stopped compromising my style to be a part of the latest trend. I realized that being original in a world of people following trends was better than jumping on the bandwagon. I was done being a follower and ready to find myself. I knew that I had to love myself before I could be loved.
Second, I ACCEPTED MYSELF FOR WHO I WAS THEN. At this time, when I initially started to love myself I was a "worrywart". I assumed the worst in everyone, a total "glass half empty" kind of gal. Everywhere I went I was told “be more positive, have more fun”. Statements like that always imply change. But I accepted that this was how I was viewed and realized that I did not want to be that girl ever again.
Third, I DECIDED WHO I WANTED TO BE I did not want to worry, I wanted to be happy. I did not want to be scared, I wanted to be fearless. I did not settle for what social media told me to be or what other people wanted me to be. If I want to buy a new dress, I decided to get the one I felt beautiful in. I intend on getting a tattoo soon, once again something that I will pursue for my happiness. I came to the conclusion that if someone judges you for what you love, or how you look, they are not even worthy to be around you. A genuine person will love you no matter how you look and will accept you for who you are.
Lastly, I TOOK TIME FOR MYSELF. I started taking time to read that new book, go to the gym, and curl my hair in the morning. I started doing the things that made me feel confident. I did my makeup and dressed up for my college classes. I found what made me feel confident. I drank several cups of coffee a day and ate cheesecake when I felt like it (in moderation). I painted my nails and got a haircut. Got new shoes and decided to conquer the world.
