In high school, I lived in a bubble where I just assumed that everyone around me was still a virgin. I never thought about the fact that the average age for a male to lose his virginity is 16.9 and for females it's 17.4, which are both high school ages. When I entered into my senior year, I began to hear through the grapevine the different guys and girls who were no longer virgins and who lost it to whom. I felt sad that this was the talk of the town but was comforted that it wasn't something that was thrown around so casually, then I came to college.
Within the first week of my first semester, I was asked multiple times if I was a virgin by complete strangers. It was as if, "Are you a virgin?" was the natural question after "What's your major?" Perhaps it's because I come from a small private school, although everyone knew everything about everyone there, but I was still shocked at how open people were about their sex lives. It seemed like who was with whom the night before was the constant topic of conversation, and everyone leaned in to hear more. Sex, something that I always thought of as meant to be private, intimate and so much more than a physical action, had turned into small talk.
Since sex has turned into such casual conversation and such a casual occurrence, many people would be surprised to hear that 25% of 18-and 19-year-old males and females claim to still be virgins as well as 12% of women ages 20-24 and 13% of men ages 20-24. I applaud the people in those percentages. Perhaps they are still virgins because they haven't been given the opportunity to lose their virginity or maybe they are swimming against the stream of society and fighting to hold onto their virginity until they say, "I do," but either way, they are the minority doing the unpopular thing in today's society.
A sophomore at UF, who is still a virgin, states, "People are really surprised to find out I'm a virgin. One time, someone said, 'What? Are you 12?' That just made me sad for our generation."
Another, a freshman at the University of Georgia, said, "All of my friends have lost it, so I feel out of the loop when they talk about who did what and with which guy. Part of me just wants to get it over with and lose it, so I can be included in the conversation."
Sex in our society has become so casual and has turned into a physical act when it was meant to be so much more. Something that symbolizes you giving yourself to someone else has turned into something that we simply "get it over with." It's unpopular to be a virgin at our age, so much so, that many people are ridiculed for that fact, or misunderstood. It's as if anyone who has had sex doesn't understand why someone would choose to not partake in it. We all have our reasons for why we choose to hold onto our virginity or choose not to. Maybe you lost it and regret it or you feel like it's what you're supposed to be doing or you simply enjoy having sex and don't think of it as a big deal. Whatever the reason is, if you even have a reason, you're entitled to it just like those who have chosen to hold onto their virginity are entitled to theirs. Above all, we all deserve respect whether you agree, disagree or don't understand someone's decision. No one, virgin or not, should feel insecure about the choices s/he has made.
