To the Girls That Feel Things They Don't Want to Feel​​ | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Featured

To the Girls That Feel Things They Don't Want to Feel​​

This is supposed to be the create healthy boundaries, make meaningful relationships era for me, but somehow I still end up breaking the rules.

708
To the Girls That Feel Things They Don't Want to Feel​​

This is a response to "Why I Have Decided to Become a Healthier Version of Myself, For Myself."

I have always been told I am too nice, too caring, too sweet. That I will allow people to walk all over me if I am not careful. I always say it's a blessing and a curse, to feel things so deeply and care so deeply about others. I mean what can I say? I am a type 2 on the enneagram which is the "The Helper".

It doesn't matter if you have done me dirty or stepped on my toes because I always end up forgiving and giving another chance. Maybe it's part genetics or maybe it's just how I have been conditioned to be.

Even in times when I know in my heart to stop something, I get this little voice in my head that says it will be ok to allow that person in my life.

I have reached out to people that I should have kept the door closed on. What does opening the door back up look like? Here are some of my examples.

Having a falling out with one of my closest friends only to realize that she did not want to salvage the relationship after reaching out.

Donating a large amount of money to an ex partner's fundraiser.

Genuinely caring about someone to only have them see you as a convenience.

Texting an old roommate to get coffee with who time and time again would not apologize over things from the past.

Asking an old high school friend how they were doing after hearing about some struggles when they never once checked in on me.

Trying to be a therapist for a guy who continued to drain me because I wanted to help.

Driving hundreds of miles and running several errands for a friend who now can't even text me back when I try and reach out.

Giving my number out to a depressed neighbor because I was trying to be nice while my friends told me not to.

And last but not least,

Slipping back into someone's life when I know it's not good for me because we want different things.

I am human and recognize I will make mistakes. When it comes to the nature of the heart, it's quite a fickle game. I aim to do what's right by helping others but then have the risk of getting too connected and too involved to the point where I end up hurting myself and even the other person in the long run.

What I am trying to teach myself is that I don't always have to do what I think is right, if it is not right for me. For example, the neighbor that secretly likes me saying he won't eat and is severely depressed wanting to grab food to make him feel better. Then me thinking I need to be there for him despite knowing his true feelings for me that I cannot reciprocate. I am learning that it may be the "right" thing to go and help him though his sorrows, but it is not the best thing because I will just end up leading him on instead.

Creating boundaries is the key to peace. Saying no is the key to peace. Being able to let go of something that does little for you is the key to peace. Saving your emotional energy for yourself is the key to peace. There are a lot of things I can do to bring me the peace I deserve, but I am still learning how to separate myself from everything that doesn't bring me peace. The act of pulling myself away is a work in progress, but at least I know I am trying.

Report this Content
an image of taylor swift standing center stage surrounded by her backup dancers in elegant peacock esque outfits with a backdrop of clouds and a box rising above the stage the image captures the vibrant aesthetics and energy of her performance during the lover era of her eras tour
StableDiffusion

A three-and-a-half-hour runtime. Nine Eras. Eleven outfit changes. Three surprise songs. Zero breaks. One unforgettable evening. In the past century, no other performer has put on an electric performance quite like Taylor Swift, surpassing her fans ‘wildest dreams’. It is the reason supporters keep coming back to her shows each year. Days later, I’m still in awe of the spectacle ‘Miss Americana’ puts on every few days in a new city. And, like one of Taylor’s exes, has me smiling as I reminisce about the memories of the night we spent together.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

These powerful lyrics remind us how much good is inside each of us and that sometimes we are too blinded by our imperfections to see the other side of the coin, to see all of that good.

80715
Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

The song was sent to me late in the middle of the night. I was still awake enough to plug in my headphones and listen to it immediately. I always did this when my best friend sent me songs, never wasting a moment. She had sent a message with this one too, telling me it reminded her so much of both of us and what we have each been through in the past couple of months.

Keep Reading...Show less
Zodiac wheel with signs and symbols surrounding a central sun against a starry sky.

What's your sign? It's one of the first questions some of us are asked when approached by someone in a bar, at a party or even when having lunch with some of our friends. Astrology, for centuries, has been one of the largest phenomenons out there. There's a reason why many magazines and newspapers have a horoscope page, and there's also a reason why almost every bookstore or library has a section dedicated completely to astrology. Many of us could just be curious about why some of us act differently than others and whom we will get along with best, and others may just want to see if their sign does, in fact, match their personality.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

20 Song Lyrics To Put A Spring Into Your Instagram Captions

"On an island in the sun, We'll be playing and having fun"

8752
Person in front of neon musical instruments; glowing red and white lights.
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

Whenever I post a picture to Instagram, it takes me so long to come up with a caption. I want to be funny, clever, cute and direct all at the same time. It can be frustrating! So I just look for some online. I really like to find a song lyric that goes with my picture, I just feel like it gives the picture a certain vibe.

Here's a list of song lyrics that can go with any picture you want to post!

Keep Reading...Show less
Chalk drawing of scales weighing "good" and "bad" on a blackboard.
WP content

Being a good person does not depend on your religion or status in life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.

We are all born to do something great. Whether that be to grow up and become a doctor and save the lives of thousands of people, run a marathon, win the Noble Peace Prize, or be the greatest mother or father for your own future children one day. Regardless, we are all born with a purpose. But in between birth and death lies a path that life paves for us; a path that we must fill with something that gives our lives meaning.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments