One Time I Was Kind Of Engaged, And It Was Awkward AF

One Time I Was Kind Of Engaged, And It Was Awkward  AF

"I want you to jingle my bells and be my ho ho ho forever so...marry me?"


*I will be changing the names of the guys in this story. It's like my childless, less famous version of Mamma Mia.*

You'll need some backstory to follow along and decide how you think this should've turned out.

The guy that proposed to me was my best friend who I had a thing with for approximately the past eight years. He was close with all of my family, and all of my friends (and even teachers) told me to be with him. Plus, he has a cute dog. We will call this guy Stan. (They're all getting ugly names.)

The main problem with this story comes when you find out I had a boyfriend. This boyfriend's name was...Bert. I barely knew Bert when we started dating, but he seemed really nice, and nice is what I needed at the time. Bert and I argued a lot, and our relationship was unhealthy.

Wow. A high school relationship being unhealthy? Shocking, I know.

Bert HATED Stan. I mean, like despised this guy. Bert knew Stan's intentions, and Stan thrived making Bert angry. Stan is really petty like that. Stan knew all my relationship problems, and he wanted me to leave Bert the day we got together. Stan didn't actually acknowledge that I was dating someone. He acted like it wasn't happening. Stan always referred to me as his "wife" and word got back to Bert how Stan talked about me. Most of my arguments with Bert revolved around Stan, but Stan was my best friend.

I'm never going to pick a guy over my friends. Okay honestly, I had feelings for Stan too. For the past eight years. Talk about a real love triangle, right?

One day, little me was strolling down the hall, minding my own business, doing important stuff that a senior in high school needs to be doing (lol) when I walk into the high school library. Stan, the librarian (a big Stan advocate), and my friends were chilling by the desk when I walked in. I went into the back room, and I heard some whispers and then silence, so when I came out, Stan was down on one knee. Stan had a Christmas ornament as the ring.

I know this sounds weird, but Stan knew I hated rings and loved Christmas. The Christmas ornament had a lacrosse stick on it, and he told me he picked that one out because the lacrosse games are where our parents became friends and our families had gotten so close because of it, and that's when we started spending so much time together. On the back of the ornament, Stan had written with a permanent marker a real romantic note: "I want you to jingle my bells and be my ho ho ho forever so...marry me?"

A real charmer that one.

Stan also gave me a bracelet, and he sat there looking up at me waiting for an answer, but all I did was laugh and say, "you're an idiot," and I don't even remember telling Bert the whole story. Bert and I didn't last too long, and I ended up going on some dates with Stan right when Bert and I broke up. Stan still referred to me as his "fiancee," but I never did give an actual answer. I have not talked to Stan or Bert in many, many months. Go figure.

That is the story of my five-minute high school engagement.

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