How To Be An Independent Woman "With" A Boyfriend
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How To Be An Independent Woman "With" A Boyfriend

The importance of finding a partner who supports you instead of controlling you.

How To Be An Independent Woman "With" A Boyfriend
Ruth Etter

Within the last few days my social media feeds have been filled with posts about the Women's March. All these posts have made me think back to a story I had to read for my Global Literature class last semester. Emma Stone was right in Easy A when she said the books you read in school will somehow relate to your everyday life.

Dorothea Baker Townshend wrote about how women are viewed as ivy growing on an oak tree (an oak tree is man in this case). She writes about how without the oak, the ivy will die. She describes how women are seen as frail creatures who must depend on a strong man to take care of them and guide them. Many girls in my class started agreeing that that is how they wanted to live their lives and I was taken aback.

I have no say in how anyone decides to live their lives, but I don't think I could ever fully depend on another human. Sure, as a child I depended on my parents, but as I become an adult I find myself wanting to be more independent. I was raised by parents who supported one another in all endeavors. I never heard or witnessed any instances where my mom took on a submissive role or looked to my dad for orders.

Yes, I think it is important for someone to have a partner that supports them. I do not however think that it is healthy to completely rely on your partner for everything. I am to grateful for the relationship that I am in. My boyfriend, James, is one of my biggest supporters. He pushes me to do my best in all that I can. He has never tried to control my actions, but instead respects my choices. He constantly reminds me of how proud he is that I can do so much (and at times handle more than he can).

I believe it is important for all women to feel independent. A woman should not have to feel subservient to a man. So girls, find someone who supports you (not someone who controls you). But remember, relationships aren't everything. It is important to be happy with yourself. Become an oak.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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