A natural part of life is to fall in love with someone. It's also natural that we fall in love multiple times, easily, or we take our time to get to that point. Two years ago I fell in love, but it wasn't your conventional love. It was so unconventional that I hadn't realized I fell in love until this year.
Two years ago, I feel in love with my best friend and I didn't even realize it. This boy was the only person I really hung out with. He was the only person at that time that I felt connected to. In my head he was truly the friend I always wished to share my secrets to, and have fun with; without even doing anything, and to cry on his shoulder when I had a bad day. I had heard people say before that there was no such thing as having guy friends, but I didn't believe them. So, indeed I did do all of those things with him. This guy was this magnificent person, someone I really leaned on and hoped that through all his troubling times he would lean on me. I was helping my best friend, pulling him out of this deep dark place he called his "life hole." He was changing day after day, I never forced anything because I just wanted him to be who he needed to be. In the midst of our relationship all of his bad deeds had really caught up to him. I became depressed throughout my senior year, but more because he was depressed himself. I watched this boy day after day hurt himself, and become angry that he couldn't climb out of the hole, and he distant himself from his friends, his family, and from me. Even though that year I cried myself to sleep most nights because he didn't talk to me anymore, and I went through school sometimes without even talking, deep down I knew that I would never give up on him. Yet, I had to let him go so that I could be something in life.
Because I fell in love with the best and worse guy that ever came into my life I learned pain. This pain that lifted me and helped me to be strong. I learned independence because I didn't really have friends, I didn't have that person to lean on anymore. Most importantly I learned SELF HAPPINESS, and with that came a world of opportunities that stood in front of me. My grades came together, and I committed to Seton Hill University, and even when I was alone I never truly felt alone because I also learned self love. Because I fell in love I learned to never let someone hurt me like that again. Deep down I know he loves me too, but because I fell in love I healed myself into this person I always aspired to be. I didn't let anyone hold me down anymore.
A year down the road he texted me and told that I was his inspiration in life. That I was one of the reasons he would he eventually climb out of his hole. He's not quite there yet, but because I fell in love with this extraordinary person, I now value the true meaning of humbleness, and love, and pain. Which will always be the sources that drive me to be great and that's because he taught me without even knowing, what it's like to feel and to live. I will always love you.
