I grew up in a world where Barbie dolls set the body standard and Tumblr models became the norm. I grew up in a world where the sacred art of photoshopping paved its way through the magazines and imbedded its toxins in the minds of young girls. I grew up in a world where women were objectified and expected to conform to society’s ever-warped standards of beauty. But despite the obvious cultural issues that our society has held towards beauty, times have changed and I naively thought that this toxic trend of distorted beauty was finally drawing to a close, as society is finally starting to recognize the importance of unconventional beauty and women are finally gaining a sense of importance beyond the eyeshadow palette.
Unfortunately, that hope was short-lived.
A few weeks ago, I stumbled across a disturbing interview that left me unsettled to say the least. "Access Hollywood" was interviewing the author of a popular “beauty etiquette” book- the idea of a book relating physical beauty to politeness is disturbing enough to begin with. My inner fourteen-year-old was compelled by the less-than-riveting "Access Hollywood" interview, and for whatever reason decided to spend the next fifteen minutes of my life watching it. What I expected to be a few beauty tips and maybe a tutorial or two spiraled into an all-out bashing of women who didn’t succumb to the societal pressures of “beauty.”
The author of the work was undeniably disturbed by the idea of women not valuing their physical looks above all else, claiming that it’s “impolite” to go out in public without attempting to throw on mascara or spruce up your hair. The real kicker, in my humble opinion, was her claim that “beauty is a duty,” and that it is your responsibility and obligation as a woman to make yourself look the way that society wants before valuing all else in life.
Watching this interview, fresh out of bed, with not an ounce of makeup on and my hair a little too comparable to a bird’s nest for comfort, I don’t think I’ve ever felt less beautiful. But thankfully, I don’t find it to be my societal duty to define my self-worth by the amount of mascara I do or do not wear.
This idea that “beauty is a duty” exemplifies everything that’s wrong with our society today. Value is placed on meaningless ideas, ideas that are not only trivial but dangerous. Insecurities live in all of us, independent of age, gender, and location, yet are especially prominent in young girls- the same audience that is being bred to think that “beauty is a duty.” This correlation between toxic values and self-harm is no coincidence, as eating disorders and dangerous obsessions with demeanors consume young women today. I, a nineteen-year-old female, am no stranger to these insecurities and doubts, even without the “beauty is a duty” mantra whispered slyly in my ear; but thankfully, I was raised to recognize immorality when I see it, starting with the idea of telling a woman that her “mediocre beauty is impolite.”
I’m not naive enough to believe that we, as women, are immune of duties or obligations; humans, in general, are taxed with duties every second of every day. But these civic duties hardly come in the form of deep-conditioning our hair or wearing a corset to make our appearance a little easier on the eyes. We have the duty of treating others with the kindness and respect that we ourselves expect. We have the duty of loving our neighbors and helping those less fortunate. We have the duties of carrying ourselves with poise, class, and benevolence, all the while vowing to never purposely inflict an ounce of insecurity on another person, no matter how little mascara he or she wears. If society begins to value the distorted and impossible version of beauty it has created over basic humane and moral duties, then our looks will be all for null as we become uglier on the inside than we are pretty on the outside.
Today, a variety of body shapes are being represented in the modeling industry, and feminist movements are finally taking root where sexist assumptions used to stand. Today, women are finding self-worth beyond the kitchen and the idea of atypical beauty is becoming increasingly appreciated. But today, books are being sold that preach of the “duties” of a woman to apply makeup and do her hair, as if one’s self-worth is defined by her lipliner. While we’re getting closer to living in a world that doesn’t distort the idea of beauty and confuse a woman’s worth with a bottle of foundation, we still must work to breed a society that understands the true duties and obligations of life.
Today, I carried myself with kindness and poise, and I'm proud to say that I fulfilled my civic duty of being a decent human being. And guess what- I did so all without an ounce of makeup.
