It is OK to be single. It has taken me a while to realize that, but recently I have started my search for myself. I am a huge supporter of relationships and falling in love, but I do not believe they work unless you are completely whole yourself.

There is no one that can complete you. That is a phrase we should have bagged a long time ago. Now your significant other should compliment you. I don’t mean saying nice things about you (which there is no problem with that). I am talking about how your partner should build you up, be on level playing field, and never make you feel lesser.

I have spent most of my adolescent life grasping for a relationship to make me whole, and recently I realized only I can do that. When you lose yourself in a relationship it isn’t good for either partner. In order to have a happy committed relationship, both people need to be able to hold themselves accountable. I recently went through a breakup, and it ended really well, but it still sucks (because, well, breakups just suck in general). Most of my friends are in serious relationships, and I even have friends engaged to their high school sweethearts. It is kind of insane to think that I am old enough to be married.

I have spent a lot of time thinking, "Well, what's wrong with me?" Nothing is wrong with me. In fact, my last relationship was great, I just let myself get too comfortable and I stopped doing things for me. It was not the other person's fault by any means. This is not the reason we separated, but I have looked back on the relationship and realized this over time.

When you live your life with a sole purpose of finding a significant other you can miss out on a lot of different opportunities. When you begin to stop speaking your truth then it starts to become unhealthy. I have been lucky enough to date some pretty terrific people, and they each have helped me grow as a person. The thing is though I need to be able to do that myself as well, and not completely throw myself into a relationship. I lose myself every time, and I can’t stay afloat.

Now I am not saying relationships are a no go. They are amazing! I see so many people in beautiful healthy relationships, but it is because both people are in a good healthy state.

This state that I am speaking of is a healthy mind, body, and spirit. A lot of self-love goes into being able to be in a committed relationship. That is a lot of something that I do not quite have yet. This is completely OK because I am always growing, but now that I am aware I can begin to grow even more. I can now dedicate my time to me, and this is not a selfish way of living, this is how people survive.

I give myself and give myself, but I never actually sit and get to know myself. You cannot let yourself forget the things you love to do. You should find the things that bring you joy and start pursuing them. Begin doing things for you and not for other people.

Stop searching and start living your life. Living your life for you is really important, and the relationships in your life will fall into place. This is because you are living your truth.

T.B. LaBerge said, in "Unwritten Letters To You," "I don't want you to leave your canvas blank because you think I'll be the paint, for you are the paint to your own canvas....Don't dream of me, and forget to live your own wonderful life, because I'll meet you one day, and we'll have so much to catch up on."

When I came across this the other day it truly resonated with me. I think it is all a beautiful metaphor to finding the person you love, but also finding yourself. This almost made me even more excited to live because the stories I will get to tell one day, to the person I Iove, will be tremendous, and then they can join me hand in hand on this adventure. I think that is very important because in order to be happy you do not need someone. That person should be able to join you in life and not disrupt a thing, but simply accompany you in the journey you are on. They should be by your side and not complete anything but just simply walk with you and grow.