According to the words of Jill Bazeley of Merritt Island, Florida, noted in an article in Travel magazine, the “scruffy looking fellow… managed to deposit an unpleasant bounty of skin peelings on the cabin floor.” The appalling image evoked by these words nearly made me lose my lunch. Ms. Bazeley was commenting upon the unpleasantries of traveling by air and the misfortune of having been seated next to a person who had made the inappropriate choice to groom himself mid-flight. This crude indiscretion is no doubt repeated over and over when unsuspecting airplane travelers head off to summer vacation spots, return home from college, or visit exotic locales, and find in doing so they must first contend with rude fellow travelers. Unfortunately, it is not just airplane passengers who are overstepping the bounds of socially acceptable behavior in increasing numbers and in progressively novel and disagreeable ways.
Having had both a secular and religious schooling, I am familiar with a faith-based perspective when it comes to civility. According to Judaic principles, etiquette and ethical behavior are fundamental to living a fulfilling and worthy life. Judaic tradition teaches the notion of derekh eretz, translated to mean “the way of the world,” and understood to represent a code of proper behavior. Young and old alike are praised for functioning with decorum, with the Yiddish term mensch, from the German for “man,” characterizing admirable and decent individuals who display integrity, kindness, compassion and honor. A good life also includes the concept of the mitzvah, that is, a good deed performed in response to divine command.
I fear that the entire notion of etiquette has diminished in the minds of many people. Its importance is paramount, because etiquette not only provides a guide for communicating with and behaving towards one’s fellow man, but also serves as a daily reminder that a moral compass is imperative in order to respect one another and share common values. Yet, what often trumps thinking about the importance of other people is the “me first” phenomena, which includes physically intrusive acts that demonstrate a lack of etiquette, such as playing excessively loud music while your roommate is trying to study, acts which reflect a deliberate message that others are “invisible,” such as refusing to hold a door open for a person entering a room behind you, and, of course, acts which suggest that it is appropriate to act in public precisely as one would in the privacy of his or her home, clearly epitomized by the aforementioned foot groomer, or by individuals who see nothing wrong with brushing their hair as they wait for their Starbucks order.
The need for etiquette and respect for others is vital in the public space environment and especially in tight quarters of air travel. I urge you to take your hat off next time you enter a restaurant, write a thank-you note for any gift you receive, and put your shopping cart back where it belongs.
