Why Is Poo Number 2?
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

Why Is Poo Number 2?

A crappy article about bathroom euphemisms.

26436
Why Is Poo Number 2?

"Why is pee number 1, and poo number 2?"

This question came to me out of the blue a while back, and I was curious (no shame here), so I did some research.

There are actually a lot of answers for this.

None of my sources are of academic integrity, since I just wanted as many theories on this as possible, so I'm going to leave the true answer up to you.

The first theory I came across was one of more of a historical background. In the 60's, supposedly children in classrooms had to raise one finger if they had to pee, two fingers if they had to do the doo. I feel like this would be insanely embarrassing to essentially have to announce, but apparently it was to inform the teacher of how long the child was going to be out of class for the bathroom. If you ask me, the reason this wasn't kept a classroom tradition for long was likely do to the fact that students probably learned they could get more time out of class if they unabashedly raised two fingers. So why did the terms "number 1" and "number 2" stick around if this classroom tradition was so short-lived?

A simple theory I came across a few times was that parents just wanted a euphemism for the bodily functions when they spoke to their kids in public. Most parents aren't going to openly ask their young child, "Do you have to take a dump?" in public-- however, it's acceptable to ask the kid if they have to "go number 2." As much as I agree with this theory, I feel like it's severely lacking in origin. Does this just mean a parent randomly assigned the functions numbers and they became nationally known euphemisms?

On a quite blunt note, some people have speculated that pee is "number 1" because the source of it is first on your body, and the source of "number 2" is farther back. A similar theory states that, when you use the restroom, typically you pee before you go "colon bowlin'" (for a complete list of "poop" euphemisms, please click here). This makes it a matter of numbering the functions chronologically.

I found a speculation that pee is "number 1" because you onlypee-- you do onething. Thetheoryfurther concludes that to "download a brownload" is "number 2" because you often dobothof the previously mentioned functions in the same bathroom trip.

If you get enough fiber, this theory is for you! Essentially, it states that "it takes 1 minute to pee and 2 minutes to poo." Some people might disagree with this statement depending on how much fiber they consume. Similarly, there's a theory that pee is "number 1" simply because we pee more often than we "birth food babies" (or "birth politicians"-- I quite enjoyed finding that euphemism).

For all of you English nerds, there's even a theory for you! Quite simply: poo rhymes with two. But why "one" for pee? Shouldn't pee be three?

I had to save my favorite theory for last: "Pee is number one because it is the color of gold like the gold medal you win in first place." This theory is flawless.

So whether you believe "taking the Browns to the Superbowl" is "number 2" because a past classroom tradition, it's a less common form of waste, or because it rhymes with "two," it seems as though the debate will remain open.

What's your theory?



Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

57204
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

36895
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

958646
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

190523
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments