It seems simple. Make time for your significant other, along with make time for your friends. But believe it or not, sometimes, making sure both your friends and partner are equally involved in your life can become a tricky task. I, along with many others, have been in a relationship where my partner consumed me. In turn, I lost many friends without even realizing it. Now, in a new, fresh relationship, I am constantly aware of making sure the people that matter are present in my life.
I get it. The crappy guys from Tinder, the people from high school who aren't mature enough to be with you now, and the ones that got away and are trying to creep back into your life are all in your memory bank. Of course you're going to be over the moon when you find someone who just gets you! Except it is vital that we keep our friendships right up there at the top of the food chain, right beside your partner.
I can personally say that it takes some time to rekindle the flame with friends who you inadvertently stopped speaking to because of a girl or guy. There is some resentment with both parties. In my previous relationship, I can honestly say I blew off many of the people who mattered most to me because I was so focused on hanging out with my partner. But things were not "perfect" forever with him, and when I found myself single, I felt lost. The people I would normally want to vent to and catch up with were not constant in my life, making it hard to cope with the loss of someone I made everything about. A lot of time has passed, and I am in a totally new relationship, and completely receptive of the strong, forever friendships I have in my life now and I couldn't be happier. I am finally in a place where the girls in my life now will be in my wedding party, my future babies' "aunties," and will always be my ultimate support system. As much as I love my boyfriend, he and I know that it is important to balance the two parts of our lives so that we can be as happy as possible.
So, here is a list of things you can do to make sure both your partner and friends are present in your life:
1. Schedule time for both parties.
This may seem simple, but many of us are working full-time jobs, going to school, and trying to find time for things as simple as "when to eat dinner: before or after I write this paper?"
2. Spend time apart from your significant other.
As much as you'd like to, you don't have to be with your boyfriend or girlfriend every second! How can you grow and appreciate the person you are becoming if you are always with someone else? I am not talking about taking a hiatus and ignoring your partner, but even a day in between seeing each other last can make a huge difference.
3. Let your significant other and your friends become friends.
These are the people who matter the most to you! Why shouldn't they bask in the fact that they are connected by you?! Every so often, mixing all the important people in your life can be a surefire way to keep your relationships in check.
It's not always easy during this busy stage in our lives, but if your friendships are true and your relationship is strong, balance is possible. Make time for ALL the people that you love, so that you can be as happy as possible and that you do not lose parts of yourself along the way.
