The holiday season is upon us, and that means a lot of food, traditions, and celebrations within the next month.

But that also means people are going to be looking for someone to take with them to their holiday get-togethers so they don't have to go alone and deal with the inevitable "when are you going to get a significant other?" or "why aren't you dating someone?" questions.

Trust me, I get these questions too so I understand how it goes; I would rather sit outside in the cold all night than answer those questions.

So as you go out into the world looking for your holiday-partner, be honest and clever with them, and a word of advice, DO NOT use the next 15 pick-lines when you try to do that.

1. "Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

Okay, this is too cheesy even for me and I thrive because of cheesy, lame pick-up lines. Besides, even if Santa brought me to you, you won't find me under your Christmas tree, you'll find me in the kitchen raiding the pantry.

2. "Are you a snowflake, because I've never seen anyone like you?"

Actually, there are apparently six other people in the world who look like me, so why don't you go find one of them and see if this works on them?

3. "Are you named Kwanzaa because I'd spend the next week worshiping you?"

I don't even celebrate Kwanzaa and I'd be hitting the road if someone asked me this; hell, I'd hit the road if someone tried asking the person sitting next to me this.

4. "Are you Christmas because I want to be merry with you?"

I'm merrier than the Joker with his collection of knives not having someone asking me this question.

5. "Are you on the naughty list? Do you want to be?"

Okay, even I'll admit this one is kind of funny. But yes, I am on the naughty list, but that's because I may have used a few loopholes this year to get what I want - aka, food and clothes.

6. "Black ice isn't the only reason I'm falling."

There are so many ways you could mean this and I don't think I like ANY of them!! So how about I take a pass and go back to the comfort of sleep.

8. "You're better than milk and cookies."

Ummmmmmmm... no? Nothing beats a hot plate of cookies, especially chocolate chip cookies when they come right out of the oven and the center is still gooey and the chocolate chips are all melty and yummmm. Now I want cookies.

9. "You're like my menorah's candles, getting hotter every day."

I don't know how this is supposed to be appealing. It kinda just makes me want to sit in my bathroom with the door closed and locked, contemplating my life choices. Particularly the ones that lead me to hear this.

10. "Can you show me where the closest mistletoe is?"

That would require a) moving and b) wanting to deal with the awkwardness of you trying to kiss me while I walk away so I'm going to take a no here and go back to watching Netflix.

11. "Let's make this a not so silent night."

Every night with me is loud, but there are two reasons for that. 1) I don't sleep because what college kid gets sleep and 2) When I do sleep I snore like a constant thunderstorm. So I'll take it from here thanks.

12. "Can you hold my mittens for a minute, normally I would warm them by the fire but you're much hotter."

I know this is supposed to be cute or whatever, but there's just no logic here. Like, I can't even start to digress this because until I release my human skin and embrace the heater that is inside of me, this won't work.

13. "Can I put you on the top of my tree so there's an angel on there?"

Actually, this gif seems presents a good option. I do not want to sit on the top of any tree nor sit anywhere that seems even remotely uncomfortable.

14. "Is that a candy cane in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

This just reminds me of marching band and the dumb "Is that a clarinet in your bibbers or are you just happy to see me?" joke that I would make. And yes, I am telling you that this won't work for me because it'll just make me laugh.

15. "Is Black Friday already past? Too bad because clothes are 100% off at my house this Friday?"

Well, yes, in fact, it is already past and good thing too because I don't want to do any of the Black Friday stuff. Never been Black Friday shopping and definitely don't plan on it now.