All my life when I imagined going away to college, I always pictured living with one of my best friends. I had this unrealistic expectation of meeting a complete stranger, immediately clicking with her, and being best friends. That's what happens for everyone, right? I would read these articles that people had written to their roommate thanking them for their friendship, and I couldn't wait for that experience. Unfortunately, I never got it.
I decided to go random with my roommate for my freshman year of college. I was going to a school where I didn't know anyone, and I was really hoping I clicked with my roommate. Prior to moving in together, we had exchanged a few texts, but we had not gotten to know each other, which I had hoped would change. Once we moved in though, it didn't change. Not in the slightest.
I tried to keep an open mind, but it became apparent that we were just two completely different people.
Our room was always silent because neither one of us knew what to say to each other.
I hated being in my room and would call my mom crying because I felt like I had to escape. After talking to my RA, I realized nothing was going to change. When I would go home, which was quite a bit, I would cry at the thought of going back to that room.
At the time, I felt so much pressure to make it work. I was struggling with accepting that the "perfect" roommate situation I had envisioned in my head was not going to be a reality for me. Letting go of this expectation was what held me back the most. My point of this isn't to make you feel bad for me. I want you to realize that it's okay to not have the perfect roommate situation.
It's okay to not have the ultimate college experience that you imagined.
In the end, every experience is unique which is easy to forget when we are constantly seeing other people's lives on social media. We think that everyone has the perfect living situation, but we only see what they share. I don't want anyone to feel alone when they think about how much they don't like their living situation.
It's important to remember that this experience, whether it be good or bad, will be an experience you can learn from. Sometimes the toughest situations result in the greatest amount of growth. Use the negatives of the situation as motivation to go out and meet new people. In the end, you are in charge of your own happiness. You can't blame being dealt a sucky situation for everything. Just try to make it through the year, and know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
