Everyone feels like their friends don't care about them sometimes. It can't be helped. Teenagers are full of teenage angst. There comes a time, though, where it isn't all in your head anymore. You're always the one making the plans. You try to include them in everything and keep them updated. Then, you go on Facebook or SnapChat and see that, while you're wishing they would text you back, they're having a great time together. It really stings. You're the one getting hung up on. You're the one they only include when you overhear their plans. Even then, they don't really want you there. They always let you drive, because then they don't have to worry about gas money. They'll cut you off in the middle of a conversation and not pay attention to your stories. They're terrible friends. They're your only friends, though. You think that without them you'll be lost. That isn't true.
You are such an amazing person. You treat people the way you wish you were treated when you were younger. People will take advantage of that. They'll tear you down. They'll make you feel unimportant, a background friend. This is not what you should be, or how you should feel. Show them your worth more than your car, or your advice, or your money. Stop being there for them, and maybe they'll realize they actually need you. If they don't realize that, you don't need them. It's so much better to be alone than it is to let people make you feel small. Your soul is as colorful as the northern lights, but you are dulled by the negative thoughts of the people you call friends. Cutting those people out of your life will make you feel so much lighter.
When is enough, enough? When your panic attacks start happening during the day? When they start tearing you down in front of strangers? Don't let it get that far. There are plenty of people like you out in the world. All you need to do is let go and go find them.
