When I was a little girl, I wanted to be many different things. Some practical, like a veterinarian, psychologist, marine biologist, Special Victims Cop (a la Olivia Benson), and some a little out there, like a princess or a mermaid. But as I got older, reality started to shape around me. I despised math and science, which ruled out a lot of professions. I enjoyed psychology, but the amount of schooling and internships and money deterred me from that. Business sounded cool, but everything about it seemed overwhelming.

We're conditioned when we're younger to think that what we want to be when we grow up will magically hit us by the time we've graduated high school. And if we don't have our lives figured out by then, we're considered failures.

I am one of those “failures”—except I don’t see myself as one. After graduating high school, I went to my local college, saved a TON of money, and got to live at home rent free. I would've loved to go away to a big university, but at the time, I didn't see the point in spending thousands on thousands of dollars when I still had no idea what I wanted to major in. I figured after a year, I'd be inspired and I would go off then.

A year goes by, and still little inspiration. I took a few early childhood classes, thinking I wanted to be a teacher. After about a month in, I realized that was not my calling. And that's okay. I'm glad I spent less than $1,000 on classes in order to figure out it wasn't for me.

Currently, I'm taking Creative Writing classes, and I'm beyond happy. English in general has always been my strong suit, and I'm confident I will end up doing something involving writing. Yet here I am, so close to graduating with my Associates in Arts, and I still do not have set plans after.

"If you don't continue college now, you're never going to go back." "How do you not know what you want to do yet?" "But there's sooo many options to do with English, just pick one!" "Don't you want to get out of this town and see what else is out there?" "Oh, so you're just going to stay here until you figure it out? Okay..."

I get these questions, along with a heaping helping of side-eye and condescendence, 99% of the time I tell someone I don't have concrete plans after graduating with my AA. They look at me like I'm some poor, lost puppy. But that's okay, let them judge. What they don't know is that I'm also working 30-40 hours a week at a job I love which also pays for me to continue the education I need at this point in time. What they don't know is that I am trying out all these new things in order to help me decide what I want to do (shoutout to Odyssey!). What they don't know is that I am perfectly content with not knowing what the hell I'm doing.

It's okay if you're still figuring out what you want to major in. It's okay to wait until you're confident in what you're doing. It's okay if you're confused. It's okay if you don't want to settle for a profession that you know you won't be happy in. It's okay to allow yourself time to grow as a person first, and explore the options that you are considering.

What's NOT okay is being shamed, humiliated, criticized, belittled, or underestimated all because you are unsure of what the future has in store for you and your profession. It is YOUR choice, YOUR money, YOUR future, YOUR interests, and ultimately, YOUR life.

So yes, I may be defined as "Undeclared Major" on paper, but in real life, I am defined by so much more than that. Besides, I like the definition better off paper anyways.