Have you ever felt frustrated with what's going on in your life? Maybe you don't like what's happening. Maybe things aren't going exactly the way you planned. Maybe things are going well, but something still doesn't feel right. Whatever it is--you're frustrated.
Have you ever stopped to wonder why?
I have felt a lot of frustration over the past month or so. Ironically, it isn't because life isn't going well. Life is going great. I have so many opportunities coming my way. I have great friends and a great family. I go to an amazing school. I have a puppy who I adore. I love my life. So why am I still frustrated?
I've done a lot of thinking and a lot of praying to try and figure this out. Recently, God revealed something to me. I kept telling God, "Lord, I give you control. I give it all to you." Still, something didn't seem quite right. I wasn't satisfied with what the Lord was trying to do with my life. While I was praying that and saying that to God, I realized I didn't mean it. While my mind and my mouth may have said, "Lord, I give you control," my heart was really saying, "Lord, I give you control, as long as you do this." I thought I was giving Him control, but I was really telling Him what I wanted Him to do for me.
I didn't fully give Him control over my life. I told Him what to do. Obviously, He hasn't done any of what I want because He knows what is best for me.
I've been thinking that I've given it to God. However, when He doesn't do what I specifically asked Him to, I've been left feeling frustrated. I've been expecting certain things to happen because I believed that I knew what was best for me, and therefore God must know to give me those things.
The reality is that I do not know what is best for me because only God does.
Have you ever thought something was going to be so amazing, and then it wasn't? Have you looked forward to something with such high expectations only to realize later that it wasn't that great?
We all think we know what's best for us. We want to believe that we know ourselves best. The truth is that no one knows us better than the Lord, and He alone knows what's best for us. He won't allow us only the mediocre. He keeps the okay things out of our lives, not to hurt us, but to give us something better.
I need to actually give God control. Not give Him control as long as. . . I need to give it completely over to Him; only then will I be able to trust the Lord completely and rest in His plan.
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5-6
